New Month ... New Blank Page

June 1... 

There is a quote that states:

"No one can go back and start a new beginning but anyone can start today and make a new ending"

June 1 is a new chapter in my book. So far I haven't liked how the plot of 2022 has been going. The story has been all over the place and didn't have a clear path. So today begins the day I write a new ending to this book called 2022. I have 7 months to change it, to face it, to take it on!

I may struggle but I am not going to quit...

Stay tuned for what the next 7 months will bring. 

What will 2022 bring...

Happy New Year! So much time has passed since my last blog post. In fact it has been so long I don't even know what I was talking about in my last blog entry. Today is January 1st and it is the start of a new year, 2022, a new journey and a new set of goals. Or are they refurbished goals? 

I won't bore you with all my goals for the 365 days. I set my goals up so I won't give up on them sometime in February, I must keep it up. They are dreams and visions that I must commit to and continue. I have a dream/vision that I have written down and will work towards. Every small goal is a step that will roll up into the three overall goals I wrote down. When I accomplish a smaller goal it helps me work towards the bigger goals. 

The three goals I have are:

1. Finish my doctorate degree (my goal and the goal of my advisor is May 2022)

2. Lose 25lbs (My goal is by September 17)

3. Cross the finish line of Ironman MD (September 17)

I have thought about my "why" for these three overarching goals. 1. I need to finish what I started and I have wanted this doctoral degree for the last 30 years. 2. I never want to see the image I saw looking back at me from the mirror recently (more about that in a moment). And 3. I want to feel strong again. I want to improve my time and I am not a one and done kind of person!

I think two of the whys are obvious. The first "why" is tied to finishing my degree and the last "why" is tied to finishing the Ironman. The second why is about me and letting my self slack off and I let myself give up a bit. Since March 2019, I have gained 25 pounds. My workouts the last few months have been slacking and I am not happy with what I see in the mirror. 

On December 24, Christmas Eve, I was getting ready to head to my dad's to celebrate the holiday with family. I changed my outfit three times and I hated the image looking back at me in the mirror. I can't  go back to what I was. This added weight has wrecked havoc on my workouts and how I feel about myself. I know the number on the scale shouldn't control how I feel ... the sad part is, it isn't just the scale, it is the mirror. I feel sluggish and weak. Working out and putting my toe on the start lines of races is something I love to do, but lately I haven't been excited about it. The added weight has effected my results. It's time for a change.

One by one I will work on these goals throughout the year. It will not happen overnight and I will take WORK...LOTS OF WORK! In some ways I will go back to basics in regards to my food and my running. It will also take a daily reminder in order to get it all done. A WORD...

I decided on my word for 2022 ... A word that will help me keep focused and achieving my goals. The word is "Discipline". I know for a fact I will not always have motivation to get things done so I will need discipline. And it will take a lot of it, if I want to get it all done. I can't waste time, I have to remember my "why" and I need to get it done! Or in the words of a friend of mine #LFG

Happy New Year!!

 

Day 4 out of 70

Today was a recovery bike workout, which I completed this morning. I got up and got out the door without any problems this morning. Tomorrow is a run and my plan is to get it done in the AM. 

I submitting section of my dissertation this week so waiting to hear back from my advisor. I keep checking but so far nothing has come back yet. As soon as I get some edits back I will get working on that.

It is currently 9 pm and I need to get my breakfast and lunch together for tomorrow.

It was a long day at work, where I got very little done, but had a lot of frustration. I feel like I will never get all of it done and I need to! The pressure is on...

I also received all my loan paperwork and I need to work my way through all the information.

This weekend I need to figure out when to move money around and how much.

Got get some shit done!!

Day 3 of 70

 Today is day 3 of 70 which will guide me to through four more races. I worked on my school work in the morning and got my workout done this evening. Tomorrow I will workout in the AM and get some school work done. Work is getting a bit stressful and I need to remind myself that I have to save some time for myself. I have been tired lately but no time to sleep in, I have too much to do.

My to do list at work and at home is very long. I often feel there isn't enough time in the day.

Just taking it one day at a time.

I now need to go put my breakfast and lunch together!

Have a great night!

Less than 70 days = 4 more races

 

Day 1 and 2

Last week a woman told me about this challenge she was doing for 75 days starting August 1. The challenge included drinking 100 ounces of water, working out twice a day for 45 minutes each time, reading 10 pages, following a nutritional diet, and taking a progress photo of you every day. The point of this challenge is to practice self discipline.

Although this is not the challenge for me but it had me thinking. Instead of 75 days I have 70 days to complete four more races. I have a 2.5 K open water swim, a Ironman 70.3, a sprint triathlon and a full marathon on day 70; October 9. Over the last 7 months I have not been consistent with my training. I have been training but I have not been in the right head space. As a result I may have completed the workouts but without any passion or focus. Of course I am always working on my diet and nutrition. I have also been sporadic with my school work, I am so close I just need to get it done. And finally I have not been journaling a consistent basis. 

In the past I was very disciplined to get workouts, work, and school work done, I was a machine and made sure it all got done! I need this back in the next 70 days with passion and focus!

So my plan everyday for 70 days...

1. workouts in the AM

2. work

3. at least 1 hour of school in the AM

4. Journal every day for me...I will use my blog to journal but does not mean I will post on social media.

Due to a triathlon yesterday I was very tired so combining day 1 & 2 together...I will continue.

Bring on day 3...

Surprise Yourself!

#Believe

The Summer of Mo - Finish What You Started

Yesterday was Memorial Day. The day we honor those individuals that made the ultimate sacrifice for our country. It was also the unofficial beginning of Summer. Today was June 1^st and I am officially declaring this the "Summer of Mo!" For those of you who don’t know, I am Mo. It is a nickname I have had for almost 50 years. And this is the summer I finish what I started or at least get closer to my finish line. Since I moved back to Massachusetts over 10 months ago, I still don’t feel completely settled and I have been using this as an excuse or a crutch. It’s time to pull up my big girl pants and get things done.

So what do I need to get done or finish what I started so much and I am taking you on my journey during the Summer of Mo. Number one: take care of some debt and get pre-approved for a mortgage so I can try to buy something, in the midst of this real estate craziness. Number two: continue to work hard or maybe a bit harder to get as much done as possible this summer and head towards graduation. Number three: Focus on my workouts because I am just shy of 13 weeks until Ironman 70.3 in Maine and I want to do nothing less than my best! And number four: work on lowing my weight which will help me with number three and my overall physical and mental health. I need to get rid of some extra pounds and be better! In the Summer of Mo I need to finish what I started. 

I was recently listening to Mike Reilly's podcast, Find Your Finish Line. Within his introduction he states that your finish line doesn't have to be at the end of a race but it could be at the end of a day, a week, a month or a year; we all need to finish what you started. As I was listening that line, "finish what you started" rang true for me. I need to finish what I told myself I wanted to do. I need to complete these projects.

I will admit that these four finish lines may not be complete within the next 13 weeks, it is my goal to do as much work as possible that I can at least see the light at the end of the tunnel or the finish line tape! The Summer of Mo may seem selfish but in the end it could be beneficial to everyone. Working towards these goals and finishing what I started; I will be more focused; stronger and happier. I will keep working! I will keep moving!

Stay Positive, Test Negative

 It's been a year, a very long year. As individuals, as a society, we have tried our best to make the best of this year. There have been highs and very low lows throughout the last 365 days. 

For me, and many other athletes, it has been over 365 days since my last endurance race. I completed a half marathon in February, never thinking I wouldn't complete the other races on my calendar. I had goals for 2020 but they were put on hold and out of my control.

Day by day I would continue to train with the hopes that I would be able to stand on a start line again very soon. But that hasn't happened yet and instead of finishing more races I have become a whiner...which I HATE! (I also think my friends and family hate it too).

Recently two more races, in which I registered, were cancelled or postponed. The first was a 70.3 triathlon scheduled for June and the second was a half marathon scheduled for April. I know that cancelling or postponing the race dates is not what the race directors want to do. It is as much out of their hands as it is out of mine but it still makes me feel so deflated. I even found myself silently crying at my desk at work when I read the announcement about the race scheduled for June. Slowly I have lost a bit of my passion...and I need to get it back.

When not training or going to school I work full time as an Assistant Athletic Director for a DII (DI Hockey) athletic program. This past year has been tough on the staff, coaches and more importantly our student-athletes. Every time a competition/game has been cancelled I feel their pain. I understand what they are going through. However, they have continued to train and face this year with strength and style (I have a lot to learn).

As part of my job, I work at our covid testing center. Many of our student-athletes and staff are being tested for covid three times a week. As I hand each individual their test tube for their nasal swab, I send them off with my positive message of "stay positive, test negative". I need to start taking my own advice! 

It's time to pull up my big girl pants, stop whining, and find my passion (or a new passion) again. I need to stay positive and more importantly, test negative! It's time to refocus and find my passion to train for life again! I know I will race again, I just need to train like it!! 

You get by with a little help from your friends!!

 

I know it has been a couple of weeks since my last post but I wanted to thank everyone who responded to me. Your words of encouragement were appreciated and I am thankful for those who shared their own stories and struggles. 

As a result of my last blog post, I hid my scale. I decided I didn't need it anymore. Or I could do without it for a period of time. I started thinking about it after I posted my blog but then hearing from everyone made me think even harder. What finally put me over the edge was one morning when I was putting my running jacket on heading out for a run. 

I bought this jacket two years ago. It's a New Balance winter running jacket and I love it. It is very warm, sometimes too warm for certain days, but I digress. I put that jacket on, looked in the mirror and it fits the same as it did the day I bought it. So the numbers on the scale may be rising but my body isn't changing. I then took a look at my closet, clothes I bought three years ago I am still wearing, so I decided at that moment my scale needed "a time out".

Last week I had a "new patient" doctor's appointment. Since moving and getting new health insurance I felt it was time to find a new doctor. Of course I hate these appointments, it's like a first date that you don't want to be on! You have to share, with this total stranger, every medical condition and surgery you have ever had. And I have found through the years that when I share that I am a marathoner and a triathlete, the number of hours and days that I train the nurses and doctors always give me a look like they don't believe me.

I am happy to share that this last first date, oh I mean appointment, went much better than I could have hoped for. We talked a lot about my past conditions, surgeries, and my struggle with the scale. I shared that I workout/train religiously and I record my food every day. I didn't get any strange looks and I think they believed me. The one piece of advice the doctor shared was that I needed to increase my calorie intake!

This made me laugh, which I did to myself, but there is a reason why I laughed. As soon as the appointment was done I called my friend Mary Lou. ML is a dietician and a dear friend who has been telling me for years that I was not eating enough. So taking the advice of the doctor and ML, I will be increasing my calorie intake to see how my body reacts. 

I head back to the doctors in three months and at that time we all know they will put me back on their scale to get all the "important" numbers and we will see how this all goes. As I have shared before, for the past 10 weeks I have committed to a strength training regimen that on some days has kicked my ass but I have felt great as a result. I never thought I would commit to such a workout and I look forward to see how far I can push myself. Between the increased calories and the continued strength regiment, I plan to be unstoppable (fingers crossed and saying some prayers).

I often find myself looking at life using tunnel vision. You look in the mirror and only see the negatives not the positives. Life is a marathon, you don't get out of bed one morning and say I am going to run 26. 2 miles today. You work towards that start line and head to the finish line. I need to work on reminding myself I am a work in process but there is a lot of good there. We all have goals and there are many start lines to look forward to that eventually bring us to the finish line. Thank you my friends for your support! You get by with a little help from your friends!! 

Why Bother??

I dislike these vicious contraptions. And dislike could be putting it mildly. I have a strong dislike, in fact I HATE these ridiculous measuring tools. The magic box of numbers, I believe are a relative of satin. They are supposed to measure weight but they wreck havoc on your emotions!

I have been feeling good about myself lately so this morning before my workout, before the sun even rose, I decided to take a joy ride on this piece of equipment they call a scale. And the number didn't go down...it didn't stay the same...it went up! WHY???

Why is it going up? But more importantly, why did I give in to the taunting of the scale and jump on it? I was feeling cocky and thought yeah this is my day! Boy was I wrong!!

How can an electronic number make such an impact on your life? Why does that number mean so much to me? Why does it affect me so much?

In the last six weeks I have been feeling great, physically. I have been feeling strong and my GI track seems to be settling down (sorry for the TMI). I am hitting PRs in the gym and on my bike. Although my runs haven't been super fast, I have been happy with them and more importantly I haven't been in my head (negatively) while I run. I have made a commitment to my strength workouts, which has made a HUGE difference. And my clothes fit great...my size hasn't changed in three years! So WHY is the scale against me?

This morning I put on a dress I bought new this season. It is a size that I have been wearing for years. It

fits perfectly and is so comfortable. I looked in the mirror and I was happy with what I saw but then the scale laughed at me from the other side of the room. Who is in control here?

I record every food item I consume and I weigh and measure what I eat. Why do I bother? I should just eat the bagel sandwich every day. Or how about the Doritos that always looks so good? Or cake every day! The crazy thing is I don't have a desire to eat the Doritos every day, the bagel sandwich or cake. Not because of the scale just because I don't have an interest. I know I am not perfect but I don't think an occasional muffin or cookie should do me in! 

I know what many of you will say, don't worry about the scale. Keep doing what I am doing, use other things as my measuring tools. I want to agree with you but I also want to know what I am doing to make the scale go up instead of down? I think it might be time to hide the magical number box of hate for a while and try to figure this all out! I am not ready to give up. I can't commit to the "why bother" attitude or all HELL will break lose and we will have so much more to worry about. I have to figure this out and maybe some day I will have a better relationship with the calibrated balance!!

Keep Moving!! 

 

When someone believes you can!

 

This week I completed my 6th straight week of strength training. As I have shared with friends before I would avoid my strength training workouts like it was Covid-19! And if I did complete the workout, it was done quickly and half-ass'd. I just wanted to get it over with.

Over a month ago I had a conversation with my coach regarding my workouts and how I was feeling, emotionally and physically, about myself. We decided that I needed to change things up a bit and the most important thing I had to do was commit to a strength training program. Facing challenge #1

After that conversation 3 strength workouts were added to my weekly schedule. And I had to make the commitment. Each day a program was designed for me and one by one I checked them off. I found myself doing things I never thought I would be doing. You know like making a commitment to attempt lunges...Oh how I hate them. Of course when I tell my coach that I struggle with them and they aren't my favorite, you know what happens? More are added to the workout.

One day I showed up in the gym, a quiet evening after work. The student-athletes weren't back on campus yet so I had the whole place to myself. I pulled up the workout on my phone and my coach added "goblet squats" using a 30 lb dumbbell. I chuckled to myself, thinking no way...well to my surprise I did it and completed the set. I shared this with my coach and her answer was simple, "I knew you could do it". 

A week ago another crazy exercise showed up again. This time it was "squats with legs close together" using a 40lb dumbbell. That evening I stared at the 40 pound weight, telling myself I couldn't do it. What was she thinking??? It took me a few minutes but I finally tried it. I lifted the 40 pounds and off I went. The exercise called for 12 reps...I didn't quite hit 12 but I attempted it and ended up with 10 reps!

So the chick who would avoid weight training like the plague, is now doing squats with 40 pound dumbbells. Oh and did I tell you that I even tried box jumps? Usually when looking at those boxes they scream, "I am a accident waiting to happen". I have been doing them, no accidents, and I am enjoying them!!

I still have a lot of work to do but I am feeling a lot better and stronger. Coach Roe thank you for believing in me!!

Commitment to Changes ... not giving up!

This week a memory came up on Facebook from two years ago that I felt was fitting for me today. I posted this message (photo on the left) as I started training for my Ironman. I knew what it would take to do my job, continue with school and train for the Ironman. It would take late nights, early morning and a lot of sacrifice. 

When I saw this post I thought to myself I need to make a commitment to making some sacrifices in order to get things done. When Covid started to take off last March, during that year that we don't ever want to mention again, changes were happening all over. And as much as I never wanted to admit it, covid had an affect on my life and specifically school. Nine months ago I transferred to a new school because my original University closed. I had to continue with my research but it started to get harder. Due to Covid the libraries were closed, which was a place I spent countless hours doing my school work, I know I am nerd. This may seem trivial but not being able to find myself on the quiet floors of the library I found it hard to concentrate on my research. I tried to keep going but my heart wasn't into it 100%. But I didn't want to give up!!

I slowly started to work on my research every day. I started to get back into a groove and I thought maybe there was hope. Well the holidays hit and I thought I will take a week off to enjoy the holidays and the down time. After the New Year I thought I should check my school email and one more hurdle was thrown in my way. My Dissertation Chair resigned from the school and would no longer be working with me. So there I was with my research ahead of me but not a chair in sight. The school and the department has promised to find me someone. They know that this is unfortunate but they are working to make it all work. It is with this obstacle that I promised myself to stay on the path, to work hard and get this done no matter what. Sacrifices will be made but it will be worth it!!

Recently I made commitments to some other changes. A little over four weeks ago I had a conversation with my coach about some physical and emotional struggles I was going through. I was dealing with negative body image. When I looked in the mirror I still saw the very large individual from over five years ago. The individual who weighed over 250 pounds. And no matter what I did I didn't feel good about myself. 

After that conversation Coach changed up my workouts and added three days of strength training. You are probably thinking what is the big deal? Well I am not a fan of strength training. I avoid as much as possible, I have never enjoyed it.

Well I decided to commit to it, do exactly what was listed on the workout, included the lunges, which I dread the most! Today completed four weeks of these workouts and although I still have a VERY LONG WAY TO GO, I am proud of myself for doing what is hard!

When I was in the gym tonight after work, I saw this quote on the wall and I had to take a picture of it. I am showing up! This is the year I will keep showing up...showing up to the gym and showing up to my research! Getting Stronger along the way!!
 

Happy New Year --- 2021

Happy New Year Everyone! I hope this finds you well and you are ready to take on a new year. I looked back on my post from a year ago and read through my goals for 2020. I am sure I am like many of you, I didn't accomplish all of them because of the crazy year we just had. I was not able to participate in many of the races I laid out for the year, which means I was not able to achieve the times I was working towards etc etc.

But lets not focus on the past. Let's keep that year behind us and look ahead. For the past 31 days I have been using a program to create my goals for 2021. I have a number of things I would like to accomplish and achieve this year and they are associated with different aspects of my life. This program spends the first 30 days really looking at your life and what you want to achieve. The next 30 days you create your goals and then a belief method in order to achieve them. So with this in mind, I won't be revealing my goals until February 2021 (Stay tuned). 

I will share that some of the things I have been focusing on come from those items not achieved in 2020 and also those goals I set for myself when I turned 50 in October. 

So far this process has been interesting and fun. Its making me think about what I really want for myself. I have always been an individual who sets goals and goes after them but this process is making me think about why I am choosing these items. So far some items are very simple and others are BIG. I have you on the edge of your seat so far, don't I?

Don't worry I will still be working towards the start line of many races and running towards the finish line (hopefully life lets us compete in person this year). Throughout November and December I had three rest days, one of which was a day I spent shoveling snow. And I kicked off January with a virtual New Year's Day 5K. This past month has also had me on the slopes, skiing. I purchased a new pair of skis this fall and I LOVE THEM!!! I am looking forward to January, February, and March. I hope to spend as much time as possible skiing. It is my favorite, I don't have a care in the world when I am skiing.

If only I didn't have a care in the world all the time. About a month ago I had a discussion with my coach. I shared with her some struggles I have been having with negative body image. I check the miles off my training schedule every time I swim, bike or run but this image I have of myself doesn't go away. So we decided to change things up a bit. 

We have added a more intense strength training program to my calendar. I have been lifting in the gym 3 days a week. This may seem like nothing to some of you but for me this is huge. I have completed 3 weeks of this plan. Strength training is usually the thing I ignore on my calendar or skip if I don't feel like doing it. So far I haven't missed a day and I am getting it done. 

This story is a bit of a foreshadowing to some of my goals and plans for 2021. Stay Tuned!!

I hope you all have a fabulous start to this year. And may you all run after your goals and dreams!!

 

Starting a New Year!!

 

I celebrated a milestone this month, I turned 50! I celebrated with family and friends but made a special trip to my little piece of heaven in Lake Placid, NY. This is my happy place. It empowers me and brings me a sense of peace. 

I shared the trip with 6 friends, we laughed, we cheered, and we cried with each other. We shared goals and empowered each other to reach for the stars and make them happen.

I made a list of what I want to accomplish within this next year:

1. Create Happiness

2. Finish School

3. Run a sub 5 hour marathon

4. PR Tupper Lake 70.3

5. Podium at a 5K or Sprint Tri

6. Start Hiking and explore more of the ADK Park (if Covid - 19 lets me back into NY)

7. Explore Western Mass.

8. Be at a certain weight by 10/19/20

I would also like to learn to make pie crust. 

I have challenged myself to be present with every workout. I have challenged myself to approach each workout with Joy and to push myself to be stronger and better every time!!

As I approach this next year I want to inspire ... I want to be better ... I want to be stronger ... I want to approach everything with joy and passion, personally and professionally!

Every year, every month, every day we have the opportunity to be better ... not measuring up to other individuals better but your better!

Bring on this next year!! I am ready to embrace it!!

Thank you to my dear friends who helped me celebrate this milestone!!

Being Patient ...

 

Being Patient is not my strongest attribute. I recently read an article, The Benefits of Being a Patient Person and according to this article Patient People enjoy better mental health...I don't know if this is true or not. The article also stated that being patient helps us achieve our goals. The author of this article quotes, "The road to achievement is a long one, and those without patience—who want to see results immediately—may not be willing to walk it". Now I have achieved a lot of goals but I still wouldn't consider myself as someone who has patience.

Back in January I fell on some ice that was covered in a light layer of snow while running. I ended up in the splits and aggravated my Piriformis muscle and my gluteus minimus. I went through PT and was cleared to run the end of February just in time to run a half marathon pain free. Since I was cleared this injury has not bothered me one bit until the weekend I ran my 20 miler. I ran my 20 miler on a Saturday and then did a 5 miler on Sunday. I felt sore on Sunday and Monday but didn't think too much of it. On Tuesday I headed out to run 6 miles and ended up only doing 3 because I was in so much pain. It was the same pain I felt in January. I tried it again on Wednesday and was in tears by the end of this run.

A year ago I ran my fifth marathon and finished with a PR 16 minutes faster than my previous marathon PR. This year my goal was to run the Hartford Marathon (October 10) and finish with a sub five hour time. Well while I sat on the coach, sitting on a heating pad in pain, a week ago I had a feeling this was not going to happen. I took seven days off from running and tried to run a 5K a week later. I completed the distance but I was in a lot of pain and probably wouldn't have been able to go much further. My coach has now sidelined me, from running, for at least 10 days (the day I was supposed to run my marathon). Next weekend we will see how I am feeling and re-evaluate if I should run. I have completed some swimming workouts and I have been on my bike. It is amazing how often you use you glutes in every day life. My glutes were inflamed after my most recent swim but thank God I am able to bike without pain. 

I realize I am not the only person who is injured or who has ever been injured but slowing down or

stopping is tough for me. There are some underlining psychological reasons why. The thought of starting over ... the thought of who I was over four years ago terrifies me (even though I see her in the mirror every day). I feel like the whole world is moving forward and accomplishing goals as I sit on my ass. 

But maybe I need to go back to that article I referenced earlier. Maybe I need to practice a bit of patience. Maybe I need to take this time to re-evaluate my goals and embrace my "why" again. I can take this time to be grateful that I can still bike and swim (kinda). Reading other articles and posts about goals setting, many encourage you to step back from your goals and re-evaluate them and come up with new intentions, since often your life changes or you may not be making the progress you thought you should be making.

Trying to keep going when you are injured is not smart. I know I cannot complete the distance or speed I want to when running if I am injured. Crying while running is also not a good look!

So I am going to try to be patient and listen to my body. And eventually if not better I may need to go back to the doctors (UGH). And I will try not to think about everyone else running by me or that I will be sooooo out of shape!

I will share one thing before I end. I was challenged 25 days ago to do 25 pushups every day for 25 days. By doing this ritual you would bring awareness for PTSD anxiety and depression amongst members of the military. I completed the challenge but then challenged myself to continue through the end of the year. I will not be posting a video on Facebook, as the first challenge instructed you to do . However, I will be posting updates on Twitter and here in my blog. 88 more days until the end of the year. My twitter handle is @keepmovingmaura

100 Days to Go!

 

Yesterday was the first day of fall. The Autumnal Equinox began at 9:31 AM on Tuesday morning. Fall is my favorite time of year. The colors, the flavors, the smells and the cool brisk air makes me so happy! I will admit that I miss the longer days but when we have limited hours of sunlight, I believe it makes you appreciate the sun even more!

Well today, Wednesday September 23, 2020 I am celebrating 100 days left to this year!! This year, as we all know, has been a bit crazy and unpredictable. We have missed out on gatherings with family and friends, sporting events, races and so much more (too much to list). We as a country have rallied around front line workers but become divided over everything becoming a political issue. But I digress and it is not my plan to write about politics. 

It is my plan to celebrate these last 100 days. To embrace them and make the most out of them. During these 100 days I will try to break some bad habits that I started during this pandemic. I will go back to basics and try to improve what I started. I will continue something I started because it can only help not hurt and I will finish the year as I started it. What is all of this you ask...well let me explain.

At the start of 2020 I challenged myself to 100 days of journaling. It was something I embraced and found I really enjoyed. Although I am still journaling, I don't do it every day and some weeks it is only one day. So I am challenging myself again to take some time to write my thoughts down and embrace what isn't always easy. 

Recently I took on a challenge of 25 pushups a day for 25 days. I am 14 days into the challenge. I video tape myself and share it on social media to raise awareness for PTSD, anxiety and depression that result in suicide amongst men and women in the service. I also decided while I am down on the ground doing the pushups I would also throw in some planks and bridges. I announced at the end of the 25 days I would make a donation to a veterans organization, The Fisher Foundation.

Well I decided to continue this challenge for the next 100 days. I will continue the original challenge and post that on social media until I hit 25 days (11 days to go) but will continue with this until the end of 2020. I don't think I will video tape myself every day (I have to admit I don't like that) but I will figure out a way to share my accomplishments. And at the end of the 100 days I will make a second donation to an organization (to be determined).  I will admit I wonder if I can continue this one and it will be a challenge. But what do they say about challenges? They build character!?

I shared at the beginning I started some bad habits during this pandemic and with all of the changes going. Or maybe I broke some good habits that I want back. I have shared with you my struggles with getting focused on the research for my doctorate. I am distracted by the tv and what's on, and I have to admit I haven't found much. And I get distracted by wasting time on I don't know what but not anything important. So over the next 100 days I am challenging myself to dive into my school work. Work on it no matter what, get it done before I do anything else. I have wanted to accomplish this goal for so long...for over 30 years I can't give up now. So I am telling myself that every day I need to spend at least one solid hour doing my research and writing. You can do anything for 1 hour and you can accomplish a lot in 100 days!!

Finally, I am going back to basics. I need to limit my added sugar intake; lower my overall carbohydrate intake and increase my protein. This isn't any special diet it is what my body needs. If I increase my sugar intake and not pay attention to other things my body and GI track take a hit. I don't feel well and it can wreak havoc. I am not saying I am getting rid of everything because let's be honest some of the best holidays are coming up and that would be difficult. However, I need to pay attention and do what is best for my body in order to function properly. 

So I am embracing the next 100 days... the last 100 days of 2020 to do better and to be better. We have 100 days I can't be wasting time. 2020 wasn't all bad some good things happened. So with that I will not just wish my favorite time of year away, Fall, I will embrace it and try to make the best of the end of 2020!

#Keepmovingforward #Believe 

It was the best of times...it was the worst of times!

Through all my years of training for full and half marathons as well as triathlons of all levels I have discovered that you learn just as much, if not more, during a bad training day as you do during a great training day!

This weekend I had a 20 mile training run on the schedule. I decided I would do it on Saturday instead of Sunday to get it over with. I shared with a friend of mine that I had this scheduled and she asked, "are you ready?". I responded physically yes, I just need to stay out of my head. 

I had this brilliant idea that I would run the 20 miler during the last 4 hours of daylight. My thinking behind this was all of my training have been great when completing them after work compared to when I was doing them in the morning. So I got up, ran some errands and did some school work waiting for 3 pm, when I would start the run.

Around 2:30 I started to get ready. Bottles were full, stinger chews were lined up, one last trip to the fancy port-a-potty (the bathroom in my house) and I was off. I had my route mapped out. I would do a few different loops throughout my neighborhood giving me the option to return home to refill bottles and use the fancy port-a-potty. Things were going well.

Six miles down...return to top off the bottles. During the second loop I found myself drinking a lot more compared to the first loop and I was out of water by mile 10. I had two miles until I was home and my legs started to cramp...damn what was my body doing to me. I got back to my house, filled up my water bottles again and tried to start running again. My legs wouldn't move, they hurt, and I couldn't run another step. I ended up walking for an additional mile, thinking if I walked a bit I could start running again, that didn't work. I felt like I got hit by a Mack truck!

So what did I learn during all of this? Sometimes the best laid plans don't bring about the best results. Mentally I was ready for this run. I was excited to see if my brilliant plan would work. When it didn't and my body failed, I beat myself up. There was not one nice thing I was thinking about myself. So as I move forward into a new week I need to stay hydrated and let it go.

There is another 20 miler scheduled for Saturday! 

 

2190 days or six years!!!

 

On Friday I woke up and received this message from MyFitnessPal...I have logged my food for 2,190 days or six years straight! When I was ready to start losing weight I turned to MyFitnessPal to record my food and keep to a set amount of calories per day.

I wasn't perfect at first, I missed logging on some days. However, by the end of August I made a commitment to myself to log every day. The most important thing was I needed to be as honest as possible with my logging and myself. 

As I have shared in the past, a few months after losing my first 25 pounds and logging for several months, I was diagnosed with diabetes. Cuz you know everyone is diagnosed with diabetes after losing 25 pounds. Following the diagnoses I started working with a fabulous nurse practitioner who focused on my diabetes. I used the app MyFitnessPal to share with her what I was eating and also focus on the amount of carbohydrates I was taking in, so the logging continued! Six years later, I am still logging!

It keeps me accountable and feeling some what in control. Sometimes it is frustrating and I think why bother when I record everything but still the scale doesn't move. However, as an update in that category, the scale has been going down for the past four weeks. Slowly, 1/2 pound per week but it has been going down...Woo Hoo!!

It has been four weeks since I started my new job. I can't believe it. I have enjoyed it a lot and time is flying by. Throughout this time I have been trying to figure out my schedule and balance everything, workouts, school work, and work. I have been moving things around to see what works best. For several years I worked very hard at being a morning worker outer. I would get my workouts done, head to work and then head to the library to do my school work. 

I think mentally I took the summer off from school and I am working hard at getting that motivation back. This past week I thought I would try to change things up to see how I do. So for the five days this past week I worked out after work. I always hated working out after work because I would find the time to talk myself out of it. But this week something magical happen, I looked forward to the workouts and I had some incredible times and felt great completing the workouts.

Thursday I had a speed workout that was a 3x1 mile and I completed the workout with negative splits On Friday I had a speed workout that I worked so hard at achieving. Like many of you, I did not swim for four solid months. 6 weeks ago I started swimming again and worked hard week and week to bring my time back down to my average...I finally did it Friday night!! My average time was 1:57/100 yards. This was actually a fantastic time compared to my times even before the pandemic. 

This weekend was supposed to be the Cazenovia Triathlon. This tri is one of my favorites and its a tough course. Back in 2001 I did it for the first time, my second triathlon of my career and I was hooked. Well sadly like everything else it has gone viral. The funny part was I couldn't remember if I officially signed up for the race or not. I couldn't find my receipt or my registration on the race page so my coach and I agreed I must not have committed to it this year. Well wouldn't you know I actually did sign up for it this year, I received an email yesterday with instructions on how to complete the virtual race and my registration number was associated with the email. So I woke up this morning and decided to at least complete the bike and run portions of the race. And something pushed me today and I felt great. Fourteen miles on the bike and a 5K run with times I haven't seen in a long time or ever. I did the bike in under an hour (which is HUGE for me) and I had negative splits on the run!! I will do the swim portion this week at some point, which is my strength of the three disciplines. Oh how I miss racing!!!

Finally I had the opportunity to talk to a dear friend this afternoon. She has been struggling with her workouts and I have been struggling with my school work. I feel like mentally I just shut down during July and August, but summer is ending soon!! So we promised to push each other and hold each other accountable. We will do the text message check in. We will let each other know if we got up and got our workouts and/or school work done.

My plan is to do my school work in the morning before work and my workouts after work. I will keep doing this until I need to change something up. She would like to complete her workouts in the AM so Monday is day one. 

I shared with her that September 1 - December 31 is 122 days. It is my goal to work on my research for the next 122 days. Within those 122 days I will put official deadlines on my calendar that I will have to meet and submit to my advisor. The tough part about doing research compared to actual classroom work, there are not homework deadlines. I have to set those deadlines up and stick to them. I also set a finish line goal for myself. It is my goal and desire, to finish this research by September 1, 2021.

So here is to the next 122 days (or 123 if you count August 31). 

Wish Me Luck...Always striving to do better and be better...Keep Moving!!

You Win Some You Lose Some...

 

My water bottles were filled, my running clothes were waiting for me, and I had a plan. I went to bed and my alarm was set. I was ready to go as soon as the alarm went off!

Well the alarm rang and I woke up in a funk and a fog. I couldn’t get moving, I felt tired and my legs felt heavy. The original plan I had to run in a certain area, went out the window. I decided to get a few things done on my "to do" list, thinking it would inspire me to get going. I finally pushed myself out the door but as soon as I got moving I knew it wasn't going to be good. I was moving slower than usual and my legs were shot!

I got to the 1.10 miles mark, the corner of Dayton Street and Plumtree Road, and I already felt beat up at that point. If I turned right, the run would continue, if I turned left I could walk home and be done with it. I decided to turn right and dig deep to see what I could do this morning. Up and down some hills, in and out of the sun beating on me, in and out of neighborhoods and I was back to my house at mile 7. I refilled my water bottles and said to myself I could do this. But I decided to change locations. I headed to the park where I run often hoping it would be shaded and inspire me. I continued to push but during mile 10 I walked more than I ran and by 10.25 miles I knew I was done and had nothing left. I was supposed to do 15 this morning but I figured the 10.25 wasn't too bad since I was ready to quit at mile 1.10 miles.

I reached out to my coach to tell her about this horrific run. She told me to put it behind me and in the words of Coach Belichick, "We are on to Monday". This new week will be a clean slate to try it again! If you can see the awful times of my 10 miles, my average was 1 -2 minutes slower than normal. I had nothing in me! Moving on!!

So let's focus on some good things that happened this week. I started my new job. One week down. I am the Assistant Athletic Director for External Operations in the athletic department of a local college. Part of my job is being the oversight for certain athletic teams. I was giving four teams to work with, women's tennis, men's lacrosse, cross country/track & field, and women's triathlon!! Yes I am excited! 

Other things to be happy about. To the left is a picture of my very first marathon medal. It is a Tiffany Necklace, they were a sponsor of  

the race and when we crossed the finish line we were given a small Tiffany Blue Box wrapped in a white bow! I love this necklace and wore it every day for years. It reminded me of who I was and what I could accomplish. Well four years ago I was playing around with my neighbors dog and she jumped up on me and the necklace broke. I put it in a box and forgot all about it until I was packing to move. I recently brought it to a jeweler to be fixed and it is back around my neck! 

Something else to be happy about...Recently I received two medals in the mail to celebrate some accomplishments, completing two virtual challenges. During this time of Covid races, like so many other things, have been canceled. Race companies have been offering the competitive runners, cyclist, and triathletes virtual races or challenges to keep us going and focused. No these virtual events are not the same as the real thing but it helps pass the time. You can also earn some fun bling along the way. 

The first virtual challenge I did was a run around the 11 Finger Lakes of New York. I started this before I left New York. Although this challenge was virtual, complete 408. 2 miles, I have actually biked around 3 1/2 of the actual finger lakes in my lifetime. Someday I will go back and do more, but for now I completed this challenge in 6 weeks by biking and running.

Once I finished the finger lakes I went on to run and bike through the state of Massachusetts, a total of 262 miles. I completed this virtual challenge on Saturday, 27 days after I started. Similar to the finger lakes challenge I have actually biked through almost all of Massachusetts in 1997, 194 miles for the Dana Farber Cancer Institute, The Pan-Mass Challenge. So two virtual challenges and the summer isn't even over...what will I do next? Tomorrow is a new day...Embrace It!!

Medal from the Finger Lakes Challenge! 

Medal from the Run Across Massachusetts 

What is My Why?

I am not searching for my "why" when it comes to my workouts or training. Even though races have been cancelled, running and training has not and I still have goals. I am taking advantage of the time off to really focus on my workouts, despite the hot and humid weather. 

I am still working on the goals I set for 2020 and will see those through. I have already started to think about my training goals and race goals for 2021 and 2022. We may be in a pandemic but as long as I am healthy, I will keep moving.

The why I am searching for has to do with another journey I am currently on. It has to do with another marathon that has a finish line but follows a different course. It has to do with my dissertation research!

I cannot seem to get focused or stay focused on what I need to be doing. At the end of April I had to transfer to a different University in order to complete my dissertation, I believe I have shared this with you. As a result of that transfer I had to take a few additional seminar classes. While taking those classes I put my research on hold. Now that those are done and I got through a move to a new area I can't seem to have the energy to do my research and I have soooooo much to do!!

I need to figure out a way to get refocused and re-energized. I need to find my "Why". I have come so far, spent so much money not to see this thing through. And it is more than the money, I have wanted this for so long!!

I remember when I wanted to start being morning person and get my workouts done early. I worked so hard on that for a few different reasons; 1. I didn't want to talk myself out of my workouts later in the day and 2. it gave me time to get my school work done after work without worrying about my workouts. I shared my plan with people in order to hold myself accountable and each day I would set my alarm early in order to get things done. I then would check-in to let others know I got it done. 

In my current situation I have absolutely no excuses not to get it done. I have some time off and nothing to distract me...yet I find a way to sabotage myself. This is so important to me, I do want this...but I am feeling overwhelmed and wondering where I should start. Where do I begin?

I have to remember my "Why". I have to treat this like my morning goal routine and for a few weeks work on it first thing in the AM. I need to set my alarm and get up early and attack the research. I need to hold myself accountable. I need to keep my eyes on the prize. And in the words of a dear friend, "stay the course". 

Keep moving forward!!

Keeping My Eye on the Prize

I never thought when this pandemic started to hit this country back in March that it would affect my graduate program. In February I learned that my graduate school was closing, due to financial reasons, and that I needed to find another school to transfer into. All of this made for a fun winter. 

In mid-March, like so many others, our office was closed and we were forced to work from home. This also disrupted my normal routine, after work I would find myself at the library or at a cafe ready to focus on my research and classwork. Well when the school shut down so did the library and restaurants. So I was now forced to sit at the same spot for work and school and just continue throughout the day. 

My school closed down on April 24, I submitted my last assignment, and on Monday, April 27, I was to start a new class at a new school. Due to transferring into a new program, I needed to take an additional class for 8 weeks which I was not very excited about as well as continue my dissertation research.

It seems all so simple, like I said I never thought what was happening in the world around me would actually affect me. Boy was I wrong. April 24th I officially finished at Concordia University - Portland and I was also furloughed from my job. However, grad school must go on. April 27 I officially started at Concordia University - Wisconsin, in which I had to learn a whole new system and take additional classes. During all of this I was trying to figure out this life of no work, interviewing for new jobs and surviving a pandemic.

Slowly job searching and surviving became more of a priority over school. I did the work that needed to be done for this additional class but my research was put on the back burner. I just didn't have the passion to work on it. I shared this all with my advisor and he said, many people are surprised how this pandemic has affected them. 

I finished that last class about a week ago, moved to Massachusetts, and now waiting for a new job to start. With all this in mind, I decided I needed to get refocused. I need to keep my eye on the prize. Finish what I started. Earning my doctorate has been a goal and dream of mine for a LONG time and I can't lose my focus. 

It's time to get refocused, re-engaged, and make my research a priority. In some ways I feel like I am starting over but really I just need to get organized. I am not giving up!! I can hear my friend Mindy Lu telling me, "stay the course"!!

Keeping my eyes on the prize!!