I have been feeling good about myself lately so this morning before my workout, before the sun even rose, I decided to take a joy ride on this piece of equipment they call a scale. And the number didn't go down...it didn't stay the same...it went up! WHY???
Why is it going up? But more importantly, why did I give in to the taunting of the scale and jump on it? I was feeling cocky and thought yeah this is my day! Boy was I wrong!!
How can an electronic number make such an impact on your life? Why does that number mean so much to me? Why does it affect me so much?
In the last six weeks I have been feeling great, physically. I have been feeling strong and my GI track seems to be settling down (sorry for the TMI). I am hitting PRs in the gym and on my bike. Although my runs haven't been super fast, I have been happy with them and more importantly I haven't been in my head (negatively) while I run. I have made a commitment to my strength workouts, which has made a HUGE difference. And my clothes fit great...my size hasn't changed in three years! So WHY is the scale against me?
This morning I put on a dress I bought new this season. It is a size that I have been wearing for years. It
fits perfectly and is so comfortable. I looked in the mirror and I was happy with what I saw but then the scale laughed at me from the other side of the room. Who is in control here?
I record every food item I consume and I weigh and measure what I eat. Why do I bother? I should just eat the bagel sandwich every day. Or how about the Doritos that always looks so good? Or cake every day! The crazy thing is I don't have a desire to eat the Doritos every day, the bagel sandwich or cake. Not because of the scale just because I don't have an interest. I know I am not perfect but I don't think an occasional muffin or cookie should do me in!
I know what many of you will say, don't worry about the scale. Keep doing what I am doing, use other things as my measuring tools. I want to agree with you but I also want to know what I am doing to make the scale go up instead of down? I think it might be time to hide the magical number box of hate for a while and try to figure this all out! I am not ready to give up. I can't commit to the "why bother" attitude or all HELL will break lose and we will have so much more to worry about. I have to figure this out and maybe some day I will have a better relationship with the calibrated balance!!
Keep Moving!!
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