Day Two

Day two is complete and I accomplished my goals. I got up in the morning, completed my workout, a swim; did the first day of my plank and push up challenges (not easy) and had a good day. I came home after work without having the guilt looming because I didn't complete my workouts and I was able to relax. I had dinner watched a bit of TV and laid my workout clothes out for tomorrow morning. Tomorrow is a bike day. Now the pressure is really on ... can I get up again, can I do it two days in a row!!

I went to bed early last night and I was so tired I think I was a sleep as soon as I shut the lights off. When the alarm went off this morning I had to lay in bed for a moment and think why did I set it, where was I and why did I have to get up? I admit I did not jump right up. I hit the snooze button three times. I finally got out of bed at 6:15. Hey I never said I was perfect!!

Day One was Sunday, I had said I would run that day or at least run/walk. I have to admit I moved forward and completed my allotted distance but I did more of a walk/run. My hips were hurting form my run the day before...so I took it a bit easy but I did move!!

So tomorrow is a new day and a new challenge...

A new day, writing my own story

Today is a new day. A new training plan. A new day to work toward my goals. A blank page that I can create any story I want to write a good one! I have been struggling a lot lately. My workouts are barely happening or not at all. I look at my training schedule and I am excited if I complete three days a week. And those three days are not intense workouts ... mostly completed just to get them done. I hate the way I feel. I am disappointed in myself and I am not happy. I don't even like myself right now.

Why can't I commit to my workouts? I want to workout, my body hurts from not running, from not swimming even not biking consistantly. I need to commit to my workouts. I need to put my workouts first. I need to make a promise to myself and if it doesn't happen there needs to be consequences.

"Your Speed

doesn't matter

forward

is forward"

Moving forward is all that matters!!! And now for my contract, my commitment to my workouts...my commitment to myself:

I Maura Donovan hereby commit to my workouts, a lifestyle of being active and demonstrating self control when it comes to eating. I will terminate my intake of food for 2 hours before I go to bed.

My goals:

1. Workout at least 5 days a week; swim, bike or run

2. Complete some workouts in the morning

3. Add push-up and plank challenge

Major obstacles that get in my way:

1. not getting up in the morning

2. Talking myself out of workouts

3. Me, myself and I

What will happen if I don't commit:

1. I won't be Living a healthy lifestyle

2. I will be living a lie...I will be a hypocrite

3.My diabetes numbers will not come down and this can cause sooo many problems

Schedule for March 20 - 26th

Sunday - Run 30 minutes
Monday - Swim in th morning
Tuesday - Bike in the evening
Wednesday - Swim in the morning
Thursday - Bike in the morning
Friday - Run in the morning
Saturday if schedule allows run in morning

Two steps forward ten steps back

Have you ever felt like you take two steps forward and then ten steps back. It's either my weight, my diabetes, my workout plan, my debt, trying to buy a house ... I haven't felt like I have been ahead in a long time. Often days like this bring about the why bother attitude, I can't make a difference!

I don't like to be the "why me" kind of person, I know many people in this world have it worse than me. I try to look at life as the glass half full but today I am not feeling it.

It is a beautiful day and I am loving that but I wish that other things would come together.

A short post...

...but even a few words say so much! I need to get my $H/T together! I need to get my MOJO back! I am in desperate need to find my fire! I am lost. And although I miss my workouts (desperately) something keeps getting in my way.

What is my next move!

January 30th

What has gotten into me? Over half my workouts this month have been on my bike? For those that know me know that I am not a fan of my bike but for some reason I have been jumping on it a lot. Is it because it is convenient and setup in the middle of my living room? Is it because I can do it at anytime of the day ... so in case I have gone all day without a workout I can jump on it before I go to bed? Am I doing it out of convenience rather than out of desire? Or am I starting to like the bike? Are the stars aligning??  Only time will tell ... keep peddling!!

January 2016 Update

So we are 17 days into 2016 and I thought I would take a look at how I am doing on my resolutions (see previous blog post). Well if I am going to complete 2,016 miles this year I have to step it up. I have been working out but really I have been slacking. So far I have completed 8 out of the 17 days for a total of 37.5 miles and that just won't do. Time to step it up. I might as well do it half way through January rather than half way through 2016. Time to get moving...no looking back.

The Practice of Meditation ... I have realized that there is a reason why they say "the practice of meditation" because it doesn't come easily without practice. I have not committed to doing it every day but I have been practicing and hopefully over time it will get easier. Again we are only half way through January ... I think I will need a bit more time.

Other items I listed on my 2016 resolutions have to do with reading and knitting. I have been reading, in fact I finished a book last night. Tonight I will start another! My knitting hasn't been touched in 2016 and I have plenty of projects to work on ... I still have time right?

In regards to my goals about buying a house and working on my budget and finances...I have been actively working towards the finish line. I have been actively looking for a house, met with the banks and have taken a serious look at my monthly budget. If this is a goal, I can't sit around and hope this will happen I have to work towards it!

Just a few thoughts I had as I reviewed my resolutions. What's the point of making resolutions or goals if you don't re-evaluate them or see how you are progressing. I don't want to look back in December 2016 or January 2017 and wonder why I didn't accomplish these things.

Let's keep moving...

Balance or Searching ... Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! I woke up this morning made my first cup of tea in 2016, sat on the couch with the fireplace going and watched the snow fall outside. It was a great cup of tea! It was a quiet moment in which I started to think more about my goals/resolutions/dreams. Was I ready to take on more or was I more frustrated with the past year? I was staring at a blank page of a new book and wondered what would I do with it? What would I create?

I have thought very hard about whether or not I wanted to do this again this year. The last two years haven’t gone quite my way when I have looked back on what I said I wanted to do. I completed only two endurance events the Rock n Roll Half Marathon in Brooklyn and a 5K open water swim in Lake George. I had my sights set on others but work always got in the way. I have registered for other races this year determined not to have work get in the way ... they do take place on a weekend but we all know I work a lot of weekends.

So I decided I would try it one more time. Maybe this year will be different. My health is always on the top of my list. Last year I dedicated 2015 to one word “health” and one phrase “medication free”. Well I learned a lot about myself and about the disease diabetes, I went into 2015 naive and ended quite frustrated. I am still struggling and fighting my diabetes so yes, “health” is still on the top of my list. I learned it will take a lot more than just creating the phrase “medication free” to get rid of medication … sometimes I want to fight but my bodies doesn’t or vice versa.

So I decided this year I am going to define a few other words besides “health” and hope that they all work together. Perhaps the over arching goal or word of 2016 is "balance"?

1.      Workouts –

a.       I want to complete my workouts in the morning during the week … I am going to work at being a morning person. Rise and Shine ... get out of bed and get to the gym or the pool. This will mean that I have to be more organized at night. Gym bag packed, lunches and breakfast made so I can head out the door.

b.      My goal is to complete 2,016 miles in 2016. Yes, you read that correctly 2,016 miles. I have never actually tallied up all the miles I have covered in the past so I thought why not. I can cover the miles by running, biking, swimming or walking. Yes, it will be hard but I won’t know if I can do it unless I try.

2.      House-

a.       It is my goal to find and buy a house in 2016. I have been looking but this is the year to really put my energy behind it. I am tired of paying rent and I want to own my own home.

3.      Savings -        

a.       Put together a budget and continue to save money which will help me with #2

b.      Pay off debt and limit my spending on a daily, weekly and a monthly basis.

4.      Meditation-

a.       I would like to start meditating on a daily basis

b.      During the last quarter of 2015 I read a few books and articles about meditating.  I read how meditation can help in so many aspects of your life; health, workouts, weight, stress, happiness etc.

c.       As part of meditation I would like to increase my time that I spend reading and knitting. Along with reading about meditation during the last quarter of 2015 I started knitting and reading again.

5.      Finally –

a.       I would like to organize and de-clutter my guest room and office area. Both spaces have become the dumping ground and I can’t take it anymore. Even if I do it one week at a time, one drawer at a time or one pile at a time. I just need to work at it.

Does this list seem overwhelming? Am I taking on too much? If not now when do I do it? This may sound like a strange statement but I feel like I am searching for something but I don't know exactly what it is yet. I am hoping if I work towards these goals they will help me find what I am looking for (in my head I just started singing U2's "Still haven't found what I am looking for"). So is my over arching goal/word "balance" or is it "searching"? Only time will tell.

 

Just in case you are curious about my races, here they are:

Syracuse Half Marathon - April

Right to Run 19 K - May

Tour de Cure 65 mile bike Ride - June

Cayuga Triathlon - August

Open Water Swim Lake George - August

Rock n Roll Half Marathon Philly - September

Princeton Half Marathon - November

Happy New Year ... I hope 2016 is the best yet!