New Years Eve 2019

I just opened my blog for the first time in 2 months!! My last post was October 30th...well that will change in 2020. I actually enjoy writing, you may not always like reading but I enjoy writing so writing I will do. But I digress...this is not a post about what I will be doing in 2020 it is a reflection on 2019.

Like most people, I am sure we can point out the lows of this last year...the tears we shed...the stress or frustrations but yet again that is not what this post is about. I am actually going to miss 2019. The year I turned 49...the year I PR'd a marathon...the year I started my research for my doctorate...THE YEAR I BECAME AN IRONMAN!!

2019 was good to me in so many ways. The hard work...hours of training...the blood, sweat, and tears (lots of tears) that I shed paid off and it was so worth it. This may sound selfish, and that was not my intent, because I know I could not have done this alone. One does not train alone...it takes family, friends, and co-workers to support and help you along the way.

I am grateful for the support that I had along this journey in 2019 and grateful for the continued support that I know I will have in 2020. It is an amazing feeling knowing that so many people have my back...I do hope they know I will always have theirs.

So 2019 I thank you for giving me some incredible opportunities...for pushing me to do something I never thought I could...for surrounding me with love and support. I look forward to entering 2020 grateful and excited for what you have in store for me!!

Love to all...be safe...believe!

Keep Moving Forward

Working towards the dissertation, will be my next ironman!

Two weeks ago I finished my last "classroom" course that was on my schedule for my doctorate coursework. I had a few days off to recover and then last Monday, October 21, started the next phase of my journey. Section 610 Scholars before Research. I have officially started my research for my dissertation.

Currently I have a broad idea of what I would like to do my research on, now the fun begins as I try to narrow that down and figure out if there is enough research out there to back my ideas and come up with a problem statement.

I have to admit I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by it all. This will be a long journey, of emotional highs and lows, and I know at times the finish line will seem so far away. I am scared about taking this on, even though I want it more than anything.

I had a call today with my faculty chair, who will be my mentor, guide, and critic throughout this whole process. It was our first call of what I am sure of will be many throughout the next 18 months. We talked about what needs to happen over the next few weeks and what it will take to finish this journey. I told him I was a bit scared and feeling overwhelmed. He chuckled and said, "well you are exactly where you should be." I guess I am not unusual.

This part of the journey will be a lot of self discipline. For the last two years I had a schedule when things were due, what needed to be read, and what I had to do. I knew pretty much every day I had an assignment to submit. When it comes to research you can go weeks before you have to submit something. Of course I have to remind myself there is a reason they give you weeks and not to wait until the last minute.

It is my goal to have this done by the date that the University predicted I would graduate, April of 2021. I have 18 months to give this my all, to show the world I am not just a student but a scholar researcher. For the next 18 months this will be Ironman training. I know the blood, sweat, and tears it takes to cross the finish line after 140.6 miles. And this will not be any easier.

It will be hard, it will take sacrifices, it will take discipline, but in the end I know it will all be worth it because this is something I have wanted for over 25 years. I look forward to having someone from Concordia University call my name as I cross this finish line. I know I will do it because I am an IRONMAN!

PS: don't worry I am not walking away from my other love...I still have full and half marathons to finish. Plus I have already scheduled a few sprint, Olympic, and half ironman triathlon distances. I still have goals to accomplish and a lot of work to do!!

Wineglass Marathon - #5

So I am not going to lie to you, as I sit here and type this in the early morning because I couldn't sleep, I am hurting. My quads hurt, my feet hurt, and strangely my ankles hurt...but I love it. Yesterday I completed my fifth marathon at the Wineglass Marathon, in Corning, NY and received this beautiful medal to add to the collection. 

I signed up for the marathon (thank you very much Meghan Brown ;-)) with the idea of having some fun 2.5 months after completing my first Ironman Lake Placid. However, as I continued my training, something strange started to happen. I started seeing a runner, I didn't recognize. Speed work was incorporated into my weekly workouts and the times I was hitting were fast and consistent. Even my coach was blown away. I told my coach I didn't know who this runner was....her reaction was neither do I but I like her!

So we went into this race with a different plan then when I registered for it. Based on my speed work I was doing, Yassos to be exact, and the finish time of a recent 5K I had the ability to finish under 5 hours...this blew me away and scared me to death. I was having trouble envisioning that one. So I approached the start line with three different goals...

I carried this note with me while I ran...and read it before the start. My last PR was October 2017 in Detroit, I finished in 5:28. So my ultimate goal was a sub 5 hour; my second goal was 5:15 and my third goal was to finish. Well I knew about half way through the race I was not reaching the sub 5 hour goal so I worked hard to keep my pace for the 5:15 goal...and not only did I hit it...I surpassed it by 3 minutes and ended with a 16 minute PR.

It was a great day. I was at the start line with my fabulous friends Meghan, Aria, Tom, & Jeff. I saw my friend Sammy before the gun went off...I was able to run a few miles with my friend Tom...when I hit a low point in the race, mile 21.5, I saw my friend Kevin cheering people on...and it picked me up! I met some wonderful people along the course and just as I was crossing the bridge my friend Penny was there ready to run with me. She pushed me up Market Street and helped me forget how much I was hurting! The best part was seeing my amazing friends waiting for me and cheering me on, Craig, Siobhan, Meghan and Geoffrey! In the words of my friend Ellen, it was a good day at the office!! And now I have bigger goals for my scheduled marathon in April!!

It has been a long year of training and competing. I have pushed myself in ways I never thought I would or could. I have loved the journey and I have surprised myself so many times. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to do this. I am grateful that I am able to do this. I am grateful that I love to do this.

I can't hold myself back any longer but I know I am not alone. I have been blessed along the way with the opportunity to meet some amazing people, who have become friends. Some amazing athletes and friends who push me and inspire me to be a better person. Through Team In Training, Team Believe, CNY Triathlon Club, Ordinary Marathoner, and LUNAR. Without you my friends, this would not be fun. You all make me better!

I am going to finish with a story about a man running a marathon and the chunky bar. When I was in High School every spring break I would go and visit my sister in College in Boston. In Massachusetts spring break always landed on Patriots Day, also known as Marathon Monday. And while I was visiting my sister we would always go and watch the marathon and cheer on these incredible athletes. One year we were at the race and it was a cold and rainy day. We had watched the race from different points of the course but ended up at the finish area. By the end of the day we were cold, wet, and hungry. So we were standing around trying to decide where to go. Now image the finish line of Boston in 1989...there is a sea of people every where, security wasn't heightened at that point. While standing around a runner caught my eye through this sea of people, came limping over to me, shaking from the cold rain holding a chunky bar. He could have asked anyone. He held the bar up to me and said, "would you mind opening my chunky bar". I said absolutely! I opened up his candy bar, we congratulated him on the race, chit chatted and then he limped away. When I ran my first marathon, my sister said it was meant to be because of the man with the chunky bar. Now every time I think about a marathon I think about this man with the chunky bar. The week leading up to Wineglass I was in a store and I spotted a chunky bar...it made me laugh...and I had to buy it. What's a marathon without a Chunky Bar?!?!

Finally I want to thank an incredible person, Shawn Mastrantonio, whose love for running has brought an incredible group of individuals together from all over the world to form LUNAR (Lace Up Now And Run). He is a true leader who inspires so many. Many members of the group were together in Corning for The Wineglass Race Weekend. And those that weren't able to join us we missed very much! Thank you Shawn, because of you I have been blessed with some wonderful friends...you included!! 

Keep Moving Forward!!

100 Days Left

So today marks the 100 days until the end of the year. I read this on a social media post and the site that posted the information also challenged their readers to do something. The site asked what do you want to accomplish? What do you want to feel? What did you plan on doing this year but haven't? What do you want to do with these 100 days.

So I pondered this post for a bit and decided to take up the challenge. What will I do with these 100 days. I could do so many things. I decided to focus on a few things some I will list here and others that I will keep to myself.

As many of you know, I have some ongoing GI Issues/IBS. Always working on settling the stomach and have become a bit lackadaisical on my sugar intake. It is the one thing that when my intake is too high I feel miserable and I get sick. So over the next 100 days I am going to eliminate sugar, if it is listed in the first 5 ingredients I don't eat it! Don't worry I have already done some research on pumpkin dessert recipes that don't have sugar in them! Sugar is always a trigger for me and I will feel better without it.

The next area I have become a bit lazy, and I worked so hard to make this a positive habit, is my morning workouts. I have been hitting the snooze button too often and then I don't up in time to get my workouts done. This needs to change. Going forward next 100 days I am making this a habit again and part of my routine. Up early to get the workouts done, no excuses. This helps me in so many ways, one being it gives me more time in the evening to focus on my school assignments if the workouts are done.

The next 100 day challenge item, is a true challenge for me. While figuring out my GI/IBS issues I have noticed how often I eat cheese. All kinds of cheese, in recipes or on its own. It really doesn't help me so I thought I would try and give it up for 100 days. This will be a challenge and could be tough but what doesn't hurt you only makes you stronger, right?!?

I am sharing this with you so you know what I am up to over the next 100 days. And keep in mind now that you know, if you see me eating something with too much sugar or any sort of cheese, I give you permission to yell at me!!

The next thing has to do with meditation. Several years ago my cousin and I read the book 10% happier by Dan Harris. In order to deal with stress and anxiety, Dan started meditating. He wrote the book to tell his story and his journey with meditation. After I finished the book I became very curious about meditation and I started to read more books. Meditation is often referred to the practice of meditation. It is called a practice because you are never perfect at it you are always practicing it and trying to get better.

After sharing with my coach that I started the practice of meditation she suggested a book called The mindful Athlete by George Mumford. This was a great book and showed how meditation can help with sports, athletes, and during competition. I really got into and enjoyed it. However, a few months ago I noticed I was completing the meditation for the wrong reasons. I found myself doing it just to check it off the to do list instead of really enjoying the process. I walked away from it for quite some time.

Now I miss it and I think it is time to bring it back into my life. What better time than now to bring it back into my routine. I have found through my marathon training that I get too much into my head during my runs. I become my own worst enemy and just beat myself up for miles. I recently picked this book up and I am curious to see how this book could help with my running and hopefully with other endurance sports. Stay tuned for that...but over the next 100 days I will being the practice of meditation and hopefully it will not become a choir!

There are other little projects I have that I would love to tackle, maybe I will try to get things off that to do list over the next 100 days.

Do you want to join in? What is your challenge? What would you like to accomplish over the next 100 days? This could be fun!! Embrace the next 100 days!

A Work in Progress Can be Frustrating!!

I always said I would be completely honest on this page. I would tell the truth and not sugar coat it and today I will continue that promise. Today's post is my constant struggle with my weight and the scale!

The other day I jumped on the scale, trying to do this only once a week, and I saw the number. Once again not going anywhere but staying where it has been for quite some time. No I will not share the number with you! Yes, I always promised I would be honest but God doesn't even know that!! I decided after I saw the number I would look back and see how much I weighed a year ago and then two years ago.

A year ago I was 7 pounds lighter than I was this past Friday. Two years ago I was 17 pounds lighter than I was this past Friday. I know this because I add my weight to the app My fitness pal. I have been using My fitness pal, tracking my weight and food for over five years. Seeing the two different numbers over the last two years frustrated me because every day I work at this. Every day I do my workouts, trying to get stronger and faster, and along with that I record what I eat, I actually weigh and measure my food, and the scale, that stupid magical box HATES ME!! Yes I know we are human and we are not perfect every day...we have our cheat meals etc...but due to my GI issues I can't have too many cheat meals or I am paying the price for days.

The only saving grace to all of this is that even though the scale has changed in the wrong direction, my clothes sizes have gotten smaller. I have had to purchase smaller sizes over this past season. And I am wearing many of the same clothes that I bought two years ago.

I know what you are about to say...Celebrate that Maura!!! Don't pay attention to the number on the scale, Maura!! Use a different measuring stick Maura!!! I know all these lines so well but if only the stupid scale would agree!!

I am not asking for much ... I would be happy with the number from one year ago. It is a constant battle and maybe someday I will accept where I am but I am not ready to give up the fight. That magical box will not win! It is a constant battle, the struggle is real, and I am a work in progress.

I Will Keep Fighting...

I was recently looking at the main page of my blog and the explanation of why I started this blog. I started this blog 7 years ago when I was training for my first 70.3, the Syracuse Half Ironman. I continued the blog through my struggles with my weight and being diagnosed with diabetes. And then I started to focus on life after weightloss surgery. The blog covered my weightloss and the training I was doing for marathons, half marathons, triathlons and eventually the Full Ironman.

From day one I always promised that I would be honest with you the readers and not portray my life as being perfect and without struggles. Five years ago I started using myfitnesspal to track the food I was eating and to get control of my weight. At the beginning I lost 30 pounds using the page. Then when I was diagnosed with diabetes I used it to show my diabetes coach and doctors what I was eating. This all became a daily habit and I still use it today. In fact today marked 5 years straight that I have logged my food. I have not missed a day in 1825 days...5 years!

There have been some highs and lows during those 5 years. The scale has seen some highs and lows and so have I! It is work every day. I must be conscious of what I am eating or I pay the price. I know the days I am not feeding my body what it needs and I can tell the days that I get it right.

Although my surgery was three years ago I am still working at it. I have goals that I haven't met yet and I am not giving up. During Ironman training the scale did not change much but I know I got leaner and I was feeding my body more often. I was hungry all the time! Now that Ironman training is done I have to convince my body no you can't eat the way you did for months or you will pay the price. Although I still have races on the schedule, the amount of hours I am working out has changed and I can't eat the same.

I know I can use things other than the scale as indications of how I am doing with my weight but admit it we want the almighty number to be at a certain point. This is a priority for me and I am not giving up. I will continue to log my food and find a way.

The photo on the right is a face to face four years apart. They were both taken at the Lake George Open Water Swim. The first picture was taken in 2015, one year before surgery, and the second just this month three years after surgery. I have never questioned my decision to have the surgery but it is always nice to have reminders of how far you have come. But this has not been an easy journey, every day I need to keep trying and keep fighting.

Goals...The Next Five Months and Beyond

Throughout this weekend, over a period of three days, certain memories surfaced on my Facebook Page. The memories were from the 2018 USA Triathlon Age Group National Championship in Cleveland. In the Spring of 2018 I received a letter from USA Triathlon letting me know, that based on my performance in the previous triathlon season, I was invited to attend the championship. I still remember being in shock, I couldn't believe it. I thought the letter was a fake. Of course there was only one thing to do ... go to Cleveland in August. 

I loved every minute of that trip. I remember feeling intimidated and a bit out of place but I embraced the moment as much as possible. This past spring (2019) I was hoping for another letter but it never arrived. I guess I didn't make the cut this year! Well I can't dwell on the past, I have to move forward.

I shared recently with my coach and my friend Cheryl, that I have a new goal. I want to get back to the USA Triathlon Age Group National Championship. I want to receive that letter again. It may not happen in 2020 but I would use the 2020 Triathlon Season to work my A$$ off to hopefully be considered!! All I can do is Tri!!!

Over the next five months the following race schedule is how I will close out 2019. I am still working out my plans for 2020...not quite ready to reveal those goals. Need to finalize a few things and workout some kinks. Need to keep moving...some days I am afraid to stop!!

August 17- Open water swim 5K

August 18 – Cazenovia Sprint Triathlon

October 6 – Wineglass Full Marathon

October 20 – Eastwood 5 Miler

November 10 - Syracuse Half Marathon

November 28 – Turkey Trot 5K

December 14 – It’s A Wonderful Run 5 K

Happy Training and Racing Everyone!!

Things in Motion, Stay in Motion -- IRONMAN!!

Ironman Lake Placid, July 28, 2019 -- my goal: To finish the race with a smile on my face!!

Well I did that but there were so many emotions in between. I don't want to get ahead of myself so I will start from the beginning. Prior to race day I was so emotional. I was nervous and stressed all at the same time. At some moments I couldn't even think straight. For example on Thursday I picked up my friend Mary Lou and headed up to Lake Placid. I cut through Watertown like I normally would and the next thing I knew we are pulling into Fort Drum!! I have no idea how that happened. Of course Mary Lou and I were laughing but the Military Police were not as amused. Once they straightened us out we were on our way!!

We made it to Lake Placid on Thursday evening and the next few days were spent getting my race packet, attending the athlete's meeting, completing a few workouts, packing my transition bags, racking my bike, and just being a bit nervous. When I picked up my packet I tried to control the tears as the volunteer explained to me everything that was in the packet. I was also able to celebrate the fact that I was part of the class of 2019 and Ironman reassured me that I would be an Ironman! BTW, they weigh you in at packet pickup...I totally disagree with their scale...ha ha!!

On Friday I had dinner with my friend Meghan, her family, and friends new and old. It was nice to get together with them before things got too crazy. We were able to share stories and encouragement prior to race day.

On Saturday it was time to rack my bike, hang my transition bags and meet Mike Reilly. I was so excited to meet him, have him autograph his book, and tell him how much I enjoyed his stories. By the time I got up to meet him I was a bit star struck, and when he pointed out that I was a first timer...my response was, "Yup, I am a Virgin"!! Classic move by me!! Either way it was an honor to meet him!! Sometimes in the midst of all this, you just need to laugh!!

Following this I racked my bike and and hung my transition bags. I was quite pleased where my number landed in the transition bag area...I was right at the end of my row so it wouldn't be difficult to find during transition. I saw this as a good sign that things will go smoothly. My race number was 1121 and my bike was racked in the 11th row. When I was racking my bike, a race official, USA Triathlon official, was in my row checking bikes. I was standing in the row looking around to see where bike out was etc. She actually helped me to notice signs and things to look for the next morning. Thank you ma'am, much appreciated.

There she is!!

Now that all that is done it is time to head back to the house and put my feet up. I need to do my nails (yes, it relaxes me), pack my special needs bags, and try not to stress.

Prior to dinner my sister and I went to church at St. Brendan's in Keene. We were staying in Keene and the church was about 3/4 of a mile from our house. It was the cutest little church and it was busy that night. When the mass started the priest asked anyone who was doing the Ironman to stand and be recognized. There were 5 of us in the church. Then he asked the volunteers to stand up too and there was a large number there. At the end of the mass the priest asked all the athletes and volunteers to come forward for a special blessing. It was really nice and added a bit of peace to someone filled with nerves. Now we were ready for dinner and sleep.

I thought I wouldn't sleep much on Saturday night but thankfully I had over 8 hours of sleep both Thursday and Friday night. But surprisingly I slept pretty well and when my alarm went off at 3 AM I jumped out of bed. I dressed, ate breakfast, made a cup of tea and the whole house was ready to go at 4 AM...we were off!!!

We made to the village, my friend Mary Lou, my sister Ann, and my friend Jessica went and parked the car. My friend Cheryl and I headed to transition to put my bottles on my bike and add things to my transition bags. I also had to drop my special needs bags and get to body marking. I had put TriTats on but I needed some special artwork added to my legs by my dear friend Shawn. He did a great job and after that I was ready to jump in the port-a-potty line. The first of two stops!! Too much info? I am holding back.

Now it is time for words of encouragement from your coach, family, and friends. I purchased these shirts for everyone to wear on race day. "I race for pancakes" is so true!! I get excited when it is pancake day the day before of a race. My go to carbo loading meal. My coach truly believes I sign up for races just so I can have pancakes.

So lucky to have these people on my side!!

Yeah I am ready to swim!!

Sporting the shirts

Yeah Coach I think I am ready!!

Well I started the swim with a smile on my face. I was lucky to see two friends before I headed into the water that working the swim start, Mary Lou and Lynn. It put me at ease to see these two wonderful women, get that last hug before I hit the water. During this race I remembered to start my watch but at some point throughout the swim I got kicked and during the second loop I noticed it said I was in T1…so I just shut it down. I never knew my time until after I was done with the entire race (1:17). During the swim every time I sited and turned my head to breathe green caps (men) surrounded me. I never felt like I was pushing or kicked too hard plus I was doing it right back. I just swam along within the crowd of swimmers surrounding me. I did not fight for the cable but I will admit I ended up on the cable and that was awesome. At one point when I was, sighting I noticed no one was on the cable so I jumped on and then no one bothered me. After all of that I was out of the water…still with a smile on my face. When I was running to transition, I thought to myself, I am doing the Ironman!

That 1/4 mile run from swim to transition goes pretty quickly when you are greeted with cheers from your friends and family. I felt great coming out of the water...and I was still smiling.

Transition One went smoothly…the volunteers in the tent are AWESOME! My friend Lauren's mom (Gail) was volunteering so she helped me. And I was off!!

The first loop of the bike (56 miles) went really well. In fact, it was flawless, for me, in my book! I felt great and all went well. I climbed the hills, passed some people, went in and out of aid stations without any problems. When I got to the top of the Bears I had a huge smile on my face that my friend Nikki captured. I was back at the special needs bag location in 4 hours! I had a huge smile on my face at that time! 

The first half of the second loop went well too. Throughout the bike, I often reminded myself, you are doing an Ironman! Nutrition seemed to be working for me and I was happy with how things were going. 

The last 25 miles is when the struggle got real and looking back on my times and average speed it was the truth. I started to get into my head. At that time my friend Meghan caught up to me, she shared with me that she was struggling too but I don't know if she realized how excited I was when she came up from behind me. It put me at ease a bit and I knew I couldn't quit just yet. 

I knew I was getting close to the climb out of Wilmington…and the wind was picking up. At this point of the ride, we saw sun, heat, rain and now the wind was going crazy!! As I was approaching the bears, I started to get leg cramps. The first one happened in my right leg (hamstring) and I stopped to stretch that one out. The second one happened in my left leg not in the quad or the hamstring but the inside of my leg. It was weird. By the time I got to transition, I was a bit of a mess…but trying to stay positive. I made it before the cutoff, which was my goal, but I was hoping for a bit more of a cushion of time.

Transition 2 was not too bad. Once again the volunteers were awesome and Gail was waiting for me!! I had a bit of a struggle trying to stay focused in order to figure out what I needed to take off and put on. For example, 6 miles into the run, I realized I still had my bike gloves on! Yeah, I am a rookie!!

Just to let you know...now the shit is getting real and this is where I had to dig down deep in order to pull it off. I am so grateful for my friends and family who would not let me give up!!

As soon as I started the run something happened that I have never experienced on a run before, I felt dizzy and wicked light headed. This went on throughout the race, it would come and go in waves. At mile 4.6 mile friend Meghan was heading back from the 6 mile turnaround. It was so good to see her once again. We stopped for a moment to give each other words of encouragement and send each other on our way. At the same time my friend Matt Gow showed up. He was on his second loop and about to finish his 5th Ironman. But he took some time to encourage me. He told me to start drinking coke and take in some chips at the aid stations. He also reassured me I would be ok and I had plenty of time. Matt those little words of encouragement went a long way. I did what Matt had suggested and for a few miles I felt better but as I stated earlier the dizzy feelings would come and go. 

When I got back into the village I was struggling. I told my friend Cheryl that two things could happen, they could pull me from the course or I would cross the finish line and hear Mike Reilly call my name. No matter what I was going to still keep moving forward!! At this point, I was off my game plan and I was just trying to survive. At this point my feet hurt so much. And not just the bottoms but the also along the top too but I couldn't focus too much on that.

After I passed my friend Cheryl, my friends Shawn and Mary were waiting for me. They started running with me and I thought they were just going down the hill with me but no they ran the next 13 miles with me!! They stayed with me out on River Road and when the sun set it got pretty dark out there. Once again I saw my friend Meghan and her husband Geoffrey was with her at this point. We hugged and kept moving. Geoffrey looked at me and said one foot in front of the other!! 

Shawn and Mary were still by my side. They continued to encourage me every step of the way. Even at the darkest moment out on that road they wouldn't let me think the worst. At one point I quietly said I didn't think I could do this. Shawn's response was, I didn't hear that, lets run a bit more!

At the last waterstop on River Road my coach appeared out of the shadows to join us. The tough love was about to begin. At about mile 22 four more of my friends joined us too. Elyssa, Beth, Little Jackie, and Laurie Ann with their flip flops on decided to join in on the run. At this point Kristen turned to me, as we approaching the hill after you turned off of River Road, and said, "You have four miles and less than an hour...MOVE!!! She wasn't going to take any shit at this moment. For the next two miles these beautiful women and Shawn talked, told stories, and kept me moving. At this point we were approaching the hill at Lisa G's (the restaurant). Up to this point I always referred to it as the hill at Lisa G's . It is now affectionately known as "the Effin hill at Lisa G's". Pretty much everyone running with me, myself included, has always walked this hill...it is a tough one. Not tonight, I didn't have time and my coach reminded me of that one. After I was done my friend Elyssa said to me, I have never run that hill!! So glad I could change things for you Elyssa ;-)

After that hill ...there is one more before we get to the end of Mirror Lake Drive. At this point my friends Nikki, Dom and Eric joined in for the run. I had 2.2 miles to go. An official from Ironman looked at me and said I had 25 minutes to get to the turnaround and back to the finish. They had me tagged to finish the race before midnight but I had to do it in 25 minutes. Keep in mind I had been holding a 15 minute mile pace on this race and I had 2.2 miles to go...can you do the math?? So off we went with my entourage. At this point as my coach saw more and more people join the run, she said to me, Maura you are like Forest Gump people just keep jumping in. 

As I headed down down Mirror Lake Road, I saw my sister and my friends Jessica and Cheryl one last time. I held a good pace during the next mile. My friends kept talking to me and encouraging me. My friend Dom let me know that when I cross the finish line he would be crying. And over my shoulder this entire time was the Ironman Official on his bike, letting me know I was still on track to finish. I have to admit having him behind me was calming but also added some anxiety. And at this point I am thinking .... WHERE THE HELL IS THAT TURN AROUND???

Finally we hit the turnaround and one more person joined my entourage. He was a volunteer I had met Friday on the beach. His daughter, Grace, had done the race and he ran with me until the oval and like my friends giving constant words of encouragement. This sport is amazing, strangers very easily become friends. 

After the turnaround something inside me clicked and my pace increased. I had 1.2 miles to go and I told everyone, when I see the Lake Placid Pub I will be so excited. I never let up after the turnaround. I kept pushing harder and harder. I finally saw the Pub and then there is a slight downhill before you turn right and a quick left into the oval.

Lake Placid is magical...Miracles happen here and on this night this place did not disappoint. Can I tell you I don't know why anyone would want to finish early...there was a party happening. As I entered the Oval my friends continued to run along the outside of the Oval. Aria Brown was also there waiting for me screaming my name and running along side the fencing. As I turned the last curve of the oval...the red carpet...the crowd was screaming...the lights were bright...fireworks were going off...I huge smile on my face as I searched for Mike Reilly. I purposely slowed down in front of him as he yelled, "Maura Donovan...YOU ARE AN IRONMAN" and I crossed the finish line...the clock read 16:58:51!!! I did it!! I was the last athlete that Mike Reilly called an Ironman that night! Thank you Lake Placid for making my dreams come true. 

I finished the race with a smile on my face and my friend Mary Lou was there to give me my medal!!

There were tears when I finished but funny thing was I wasn't the one that cried. As I entered the finish line area, I looked over at my friends and family and tears were falling down their faces. I was told I had just completed an epic Ironman. I finished the race about 30 minutes later than I wanted to do it but the official on the bike did not kick me off the course and Mike Riley called my name!

This finish would not have been possible without the love and support of so many. Thank you never seems like enough and I am truly grateful for the encouragement I received. My sister Ann for being there for me and always supporting my crazy dreams. Throughout the day my sister shared with me that my brothers, sisters-in-law, nieces and cousins were checking in with her. When I was done I saw messages from them on Facebook. I truly am thankful for their support. 

Jessica, your first Triathlon and I made sure you saw every minute of it!! Thank you for joining me!!! To my coach Kristen who knew exactly when I needed tough love but encouraged me and believed in me every step of the way!! Meghan, Geoffrey, and the Brown/Irvine families it meant so much to me to have you out there cheering so loud for me at so many points of this race. Meghan thank you for your encouragement and support throughout this entire process. So glad we shared this!!

Elyssa, Beth, Little Jackie, and Laurie Ann seeing you out on River Road brought a smile to my face. You kept the stories coming throughout those last few miles and you ran up those damn hills with me. Nikki, Dom, and Eric B, Ironmen in your own right, you made sure I was able to earn that title too!! Mary Lou and Cheryl two of the best Sherpas around!! I couldn't imagine this experience without you. Your friendship means so much to me. And to Shaw and Mary, I could never repay you for what you did for me out there. You stuck with me for 13 miles. You encouraged me, supported me and never let me quit!! I love you two so much!!!

So as I shared earlier my average pace on the run course was 15 minute miles but some how I pulled out an 11:26 pace for the last mile and the final .2 was a 9:45. The night before the race I shared a list of individual names and inspirational quotes I would use to get me through the 26.2 miles. I had someone listed for every mile. For example, mile 2 was for my mom and mile 13 was for my boss who is fighting stage four lung cancer. I dedicated mile 22 to my coach Kristen. At mile 22 was the point she told me, "I don't care if you hate me we have four miles and less than an hour to go...MOVE!! Perfect timing Coach. I dedicated the last mile of the course to Brendan Jackson, a person who touched so many lives and is missed immensely. Brendan coached me through my first marathon in 2005. Was he looking over me during this race? That mile was my fastest mile and I needed to kick it in at that time...Thanks Brendan!!

As soon as I finished my friend Dom asked if I was ready to sign up again tomorrow, we both laughed and he said ok I will give you until Tuesday. Well Dom, I am not a "one and doner", I enjoyed this journey way too much. However, knowing that this is a full time job, my next 140.6 will be 2021. I have a doctorate to earn!!

I can't say enough about the athletes and volunteers involved in this race. Every athlete I came across on this course were so encouraging. We cheered each other on and wanted the best for each other, especially when we realized we were not making it to Kona. Also, the volunteers are amazing!!!! This race could not happen without them. I can not say enough or thank them enough.

Well after all the tears I shed prior to the race I never cried the day of the race, not even on the finish line. However, on Friday, five days after the race I sat in my car and shed some tears, ugly cry, I think it finally hit me. I also cried as I recreated the day during this blog. Of course I am sitting in a coffee shop and I had to control myself a bit.

Looking back on this day...this journey...this dream come true. I am truly blessed. I am surrounded by love and support. I am the luckiest person in the world!!!

I AM AN IRONMAN!!!

Having Faith and Trying to Believe!

It has been quite some time since I posted a blog. In fact that last time was May 27. I have actually started this particular blog back in June but never had time to finish. Between work, grad school and Ironman training, all being done full time, by the end of the day I am pretty tired and putting my thoughts down in this blog seems too overwhelming. Now don't get me wrong, I have a lot of thoughts and tons of emotions right now, so here is my attempt to share it all with you without writing a memoir the length of War and Peace.

I am currently taking a class about technology and education. I know it could be a very interesting subject but I am finding it hard to focus on that right now. I am going through the motions of doing the assignments but not getting much out of it. Throughout the last 7 months of Ironman Training I have worked very hard not to let school disrupt training and more importantly training disrupt school. For the most part it has worked out very well. Until this class, the last four weeks have been tough and stressful but I am making it work and I will survive.

I have been planning to write this blog entry for the last six weeks but as I shared between training, work, and classes I usually run out of time. However, with less than nine days to go I thought it was time to share my thoughts on the emotional and physical roller coaster we call Ironman Training. I promise I won't share every day just a few highlights.

If you look up the definition faith (nonreligious) it means to have complete trust or confidence in someone or something. A synonym of the word faith is belief or confidence. As I enter my second week of taper I keep telling myself I need to have faith...I need to be confident and most importantly believe. Doing all of this seems harder than the actual training.

Six weeks ago I took a Friday off and headed up to Lake Placid for a training weekend. Placid, like for so many others, is my happy place, my little piece of heaven. It is where Miracles happen and is magical. However, this weekend was going to be tough and I knew would be a true measuring stick as too how well my training was going and how much work I still needed to do. Day one was a 2.4 mile swim followed by a 25 mile bike. I was happy with how things started but then came day day 2.

Day two's schedule included 112 miles on the bike followed by a six mile run. I knew the course so I knew it wasn't going to be easy. However, I wasn't prepared for how much it was going to kick me in the ass. After the first loop I stood in the parking lot of our hotel and cried as I refueled. I didn't have much time to feel sorry for myself because I had another loop to go and it crushed me mentally. I came back, hot and tired but I still had 6 miles to run. My coach met me and ran the six with me. Oh how I did not want to run those miles. I headed out way to fast and continuously my coach yelled at me to slow down. By the time I hit the bridge, down by River Road, I asked if we could just run 5 miles. She smiled and said sure we can run five...but we are also going to run six! I am glad she was there to push me because I never would have done it...but I didn't like her very much at that moment, ha ha (she already knows this).

Day three, Sunday, a day of rest? Maybe in the bible but not in Placid! I had 20 miles on the bike and a seven mile run. During that time I had some thinking to do...how bad did I want this and what was I willing to do? I had seven weeks ahead of me and I needed to get it done.

Fast forward the next few weekends I had a few long 100+ mile rides...some runs...and more time in the water. Each week I felt like I was getting stronger and being more aware of what I needed to get the work done. Three weeks after that 112 miles in Lake Placid I was in Tupper Lake for the Tupper Lake Tinman, my third 70.3 distance race. I was nervous and they were calling for rain. Well we saw everything rain, wind, more rain, and then sun followed by heat. My coach sent me to the race with specific goals for each discipline. Much to my surprise or based on my hard work, I succeeded those goals and crossed the finish line in 7:40...almost 45 minutes faster than my last 70.3! I was shocked! Could this really be happening? Was I getting stronger? Could I eventually be an Ironman?

The last month has been training and more training. Last weekend a friend asked me if I had any plans for the weekend? I laughed and said yes, 112 miles of biking followed by some running and then more running on Sunday. This has been my life for months, but as I explained in a previous post, I have actually enjoyed the journey. Maybe not every minute, climbing up Sweet Road, but for the most part yes, I have enjoyed the journey.

Sweat, pain, and tears...so many tears. My friend Jill Walsh, an Ironman herself, and a two time silver medal paralympian, told me to be prepared for the emotions. That I would just start crying for no reason. Well Jill I can share with you, it has been happening. The other day I was on my way to work and I was crying in my car.

Several weeks ago the Ironman Corporation released the athlete bib numbers for the race on the 28th. Many people took that opportunity to post the number on their social media pages. I chose not to do it. I knew once I did it, this would all be real, and that scared me so much. However, with less than 9 days until the cannon goes off, its time to face it...it's real, there is no going back. So Above you will see my number...1121. The SHIT is getting real!!

I am blessed to be surrounded by family and friends who have supported me through this journey. Who have pushed me. They have believed when I have found it hard to do it. They have encouraged me when I didn't want to keep going. Even when they don't get it all, they have at least asked how I was doing. On Thursday I head back to my happy place to face the biggest goal I have ever set out for myself. There will be days, hours, minutes and seconds between now and then I will doubt myself. I will find it hard to believe...but I am trying! The real question is without faith and believing does any of this matter?? And yes, Jill Walsh I am crying right now!!

Enjoying the Journey to IMLP

A few weeks ago I ran the Mountain Goat 10 miler. While on the course I started talking with this woman who also does triathlons and has completed Lake Placid Twice. We talked about the whole training process and she said, I feel bad for people who don't enjoy the journey. It made me smile that day and I have thought about that statement a lot. I can honestly say, that so far I have really enjoyed the journey. The highs, lows, and everything in between has taught me so much and I have really enjoyed it.

I am currently five weeks away from the Tupper Lake 70.3 and nine weeks away from the Ironman Lake Placid. I usually don't count the weeks because it gives me anxiety. I have been facing the training one day at a time but often, individuals will ask me how much longer, so there it is. And as I wrote that...I had a bit of anxiety and a lot of emotions.

There are days during this training that you feel like you could take on the world. And then there are days that humble you and you question if you can even do this. I often let my emotions get the best of me and I have to talk myself out of giving up. Saturday was a training day that had all those emotions wrapped into one. I had a 75 mile ride followed by a 20 minute transition run on the training schedule. My friend Meghan, who is also training for the IMLP, joined me on the ride. She is a much more powerful cyclist than I am but it was nice to know someone else was out there with me. We mapped out a course and off we went. The first 40 miles were great. I felt confident and really enjoyed myself...then the weather changed. Rain and crazy headwind took over and we had to spin and push our way through it. There were moments when climbing uphill, into the wind, I thought to myself I am not moving. During one 10 mile stretch, we were heading straight into the wind, and I think I yelled out every profanity I could think of and shed some tears. This truly can be an emotional journey. By the time we were finished, I was so happy...happy it was over but also elated that we didn't quit. Even though it was tough, I felt pretty good about myself.

Of course then I had to put on my running shoes and go out and run 20 minutes. Twenty minutes doesn't seem like a lot but when the muscles in your legs just finished biking it is hard to tell them to start running. I was wet, hot, and tired by this point but quitting gets you know where. I have to admit that I couldn't tell how fast I was running. I didn't think I was moving all that much but according to my watch I was keeping a good pace. Getting used to this feeling is important as that transition from bike to run is so critical.

Sunday was a new day with a new workout and the sun was shining. I had to ride for 20 miles and then run a 6 mile transition. I was a bit tired from the day before but I was curious to see how my body reacted. The ride went really well. I found a course that had several rolling hills. Not huge climbs but rollers one right after the other. When I was done with that I started my run. And once again I could not tell how fast I was going but according to my watch, much faster than I normally run. I forced myself to slow down and got into a rhythm. And by this point in the morning the sun was up and it was getting warm. By mile four I was hot, drenched in sweat, and tired. I actually ran by my car and seriously thought about stopping but I quickly talked my self out of that one. Instead, I gave myself permission to readjust. I stopped, walked for .25 miles, took in some fuel and refocused. Once I started up again I felt like I had a whole bunch of new energy. I ended up finishing stronger than I started and I am so happy I didn't quit. I also made a deal with myself, if I kept running I could treat myself to breakfast...and it tasted so good at the Dryden Hotel!!

So today is another day on the bike with a little run thrown in there. I had to switch around my training days a bit due to the Memorial Day Holiday (the pool is closed). Tomorrow I will be back in the pool. I have been struggling in that category a bit, which is an unusual thing for me. The pool has always been my sanctuary. I always looked forward to finding swim workouts on my training schedule. I was also that person who would sneak extra swims into my training. Lately something has changed. I know I need to suck it up cuz I will hate myself if my swim does not go well. Believe me I won't be happy.

For those of you who have followed my triathlon, on again off again, career since 2001, I have always loved the swim and was never the person in love with my bike. Well things have changed. I am actually looking forward to the bike workouts, and we all know I need them, and dreading going to the pool. In fact last Friday, I had my swim bag packed, I was dressed and ready to go. I drove to the pool and then found myself sitting in the parking lot for 10 minutes trying to convince myself to go inside. WHO IS THIS PERSON???? SNAP OUT OF IT!!!! I am facing a new week so things have got to get better. I will keep you posted...but if you are reading this I give you permission to yell at me and tell me to suck it up and jump in the pool!

A few other updates: My iron levels are maintaining, which is good. I had to have a colonoscopy recently because we are still trying to figure out my GI issues. The doctor found some polyps, which were tested and came back negative for cancer. However, I have now won the prize for being able to go back in 3 years...so excited! The colonoscopy also did not shed any light on my stomach problems. So I have been advised to try the FODMAP elimination diet. I will follow this for three weeks and see how things go. It is a whole process of eliminating a bunch of food from all the food groups and slowly bring them back into your diet to see how your body reacts. Today is day one...so far so good.

Other than that school and work are still keeping me busy. I had to share this picture on the left...you know you are in training when your sink looks like this at the end of the day. I hope you all have a wonderful and safe Memorial Day. Let's take the time to remember, all gave some and some gave all, so we can enjoy our freedoms. THANK YOU!

Iron levels, a ride, and some emotions

Earlier this week I went to a follow-up appointment regarding my iron levels. Two months ago I had two iron infusions due to the fact that my iron levels were extremely low. Happy to report my iron took a huge leap and I am doing well. I shared with the doctor that everyone was right, as soon as I started to feel better after the infusions, I finally realized how lousy I was feeling for so long. Who knew that how I was feeling wasn't normal!!

So this past weekend was my first ride outside since September. It was a beautiful, warm day. I was challenged with riding a strong 50 mile ride or 4 hours. I will admit I headed out on the road very nervous and without much confidence. The bike has always been my weakness of the three triathlon disciplines but I have tried really hard to push myself this winter while on the bike trainer for hours.

So off I went and I told myself to keep moving forward as best I could. The miles started to go by me and I kept pushing. The first two hours went by and I was over 25 miles...half way there. I continued to pedal up and down different roads and streets I have never been on before. During the ride many farmers were out on this warm spring day and I was able to enjoy the sweet smell of farm fields in spring (if you know what I mean). But I can't complain, no farms, no food ... and we can't have that. As I road past the fields I realized I was approaching 50 miles and look at that I finished the ride in 3:44!! 

I shared with my coach that this particular ride gave me a bit of a confidence boost. I had finished the 70.3 in September in 4 hours and 32 minutes. Now I realize the course I rode on Sunday is much different than the one I did in Lake Placid but on Sunday I was on track to finish in 4:14. I had set a goal of off the bike in 4:15 for the 70.3 I am doing in June. Seeing what I did on Sunday makes me wonder what I am capable of in the next 16 weeks. 

Sunday's ride also lifted my spirits a bit. I wasn't going to share any of this stuff cuz I figured my problems are microscopic compared to others but emotionally I have been struggling. Like I said I wasn't going to say anything until I saw a post with the quote to the right. I have shared this with a few of my friends and family and although that helps it doesn't fix everything.

If you don't know me well I will let you know that the scale defines who I am. The magical number that shows up on the box determines so much for me and lately I have been struggling as I watch the scale slowly creep up. Throughout February and March I would bounce back and forth within three pounds. In the past two weeks I have jumped another 3 pounds and I can't figure out why. Three pounds may not seem like much but add that to the other three and now you are up six. Plus I was trying to lose weight since before the new year and this has been a struggle.

My eating hasn't changed...if nothing else I have become more attuned to it. I write everything I eat down and I mean everything even if it is a cheat food. I weigh and measure everything I make for breakfast, lunch and dinner yet the scale still creeps up. 

I have been eliminating sugar from my diet, if it is in the first 5 ingredients then I don't eat it. Am I perfect no, but I am not out of control. Is it stress, am I eating enough, am I eating too much? It's hard when you are training for one of the biggest races of your life, recording hours of training and you need to fuel your body. Some days I feel really bloated and other days I feel like I haven't gotten enough to eat...I feel like I am running on a hamster wheel and I keep facing the same issues. 

I know there are more important things in the world but this is a real struggle for me. I have worked so hard and come too far to feel like I am sliding backwards. On the advice of a friend, who is a registered dietitian I have hid my scale deep in the back of a closet and try to focus on other things. This will be hard but the whole thing is frustrated. How do I stop...I don't want to go backwards...stay tuned.