Training: Highs and Lows

Why is it one day you have a fabulous training and then the very next day you are counting the minutes until it is over and you have absolutely no confidence in yourself? I have been doing this for many years so I know you always have good days and bad days. And I also know, often you learn more from the bad training days than you do from the good training days.

However, I can tell you it never gets easier. Yesterday I sat in the bike saddle for 2 hours and when it was over I felt strong and proud of myself! This morning I started an 8 mile run but ended up only completed 5+ miles. Now I know that I can complete the 8 miles, I have done it before, and just 3 weeks ago I did 10 miles. Completing the distance isn't the problem, it is listening to the voices in your head.

I will admit that I was not feeling great during the run...I thought I was going to get sick the entire time...which meant I didn't want to take in any additional fuel during the run. I blame the stomach issues on one of three things...1. I ate more than I usually do prior to a run. 2. I ate too fast before the run. 3. I ate too close to starting my run or 4. All of the above (bariatric surgery problems). I didn't end up getting sick but I didn't have it in me to do the last 2 1/2 miles.

At times like this I can tell you that training is very lonely. You are by yourself, you're in your head and you beat yourself up.

Thank God tomorrow is a new day!!

It's Sunday...

It's Sunday so it must be blog day! I look forward to this day and think about what I will write about all week. Today's blog will be about pure honesty! This past week I finally had my 18 month surgery follow-up appointment...I said finally because it actually was closer to a 20 month follow, working in an appointment can be tough! Anyway I got to the appointment and found out I am not absorbing enough iron...my red blood cell count was low...bring on the iron pills. However, that is not the honesty I wanted to share.

What I will share I actually brought to the appointment to talk about with my surgeon. I have used the term "the honeymoon is over" before and with that in mind the hard work has started. I have been struggling with my relationship with food. Some of my old demons are coming back. I have been stress eating, eating when not hungry, and eating too much. I have also been adding back food that I shouldn't be eating such as desserts (sugar...which always make me sick to my stomach) and too many carbs (carbs aren't bad, I just shouldn't be eating all that I have). The scale has been fluctuating...up a few pounds...down a few pounds...back up again, you get the picture.

So I had this discussion with my doctor. He told me that what I was experiencing was not unusual, many patients go through it. He did say, the fact that I am aware of it and talking about it, is a step in the right direction to getting it under control. Once again he shared with me that the surgery he performed was a tool, not a fix. And he agreed with me, the honeymoon is over and now I had to work! He was happy that my workouts are going well and that exercise is such a staple/routine in my life. However, he agreed we need to get a handle on the emotional eating and facing my food demons head on.

We arranged to schedule an appointment with the nutritionist ( in 3 1/2 weeks) and then we discussed going back to a counselor/therapist. I saw one before the surgery, which all bariatric surgery candidates have to do prior to surgery. However, they extended my sessions because I had issues and fears with exact thing that I am struggling with right now. The feared my food issues would return. Almost 20 months post surgery and it is a struggle every day!

Since the new year I have been trying to write/journal every day. I don't write about anything specific, whatever comes to mind. I usually write first thing in the morning so it helps to get my mind working. This morning's entry was quite long and turned into a project. I decided to write about the food struggle I have been having...I set a few goals for myself...I used words and pictures to visualize what I wanted...I even did a WOOP exercise to lay my goals out for the next 20 weeks.. Why 20 weeks...that is the length of time until my 2 year anniversary from the surgery.

(On a side note...if you have never done a WOOP exercise it is helpful. It helps you lay out your goals and see if you really can accomplish them. A good friend of mine shared the exercise with me and I use it quite often.

I don't want to go back to what I was prior to the surgery...I have come too far. My only option is to work hard and accomplish my goals!! Below is a glimpse into my journal entry project for today...Just keep Moving!

Running through History and a Nor'easter!

I think I have a favorite running route in every city I visit during my work travel. Most often, I do not get time to site see or visit landmarks, like normal travelers. So I use my workouts, early in the morning, to see the sites! I love to run early in the morning during these visits because it is usually before the tourist take to the street or the commuters arrive at their destinations.

This past week I was in Boston (Massachusetts is where you will always find my heart) for work. I was staying downtown, in the financial district, and that is where my favorite run route begins. Let me take you on my run...I headed out of the hotel and down Broad street towards State. I head up State and cross over the spot of the Boston Massacre. I turn left onto Tremont Street and begin to follow the Freedom Trail! I pass the King's Chapel Burial Ground, which is the oldest cemetery in the city, on my left. The likes of John Winthrop, the first Governor of Massachusetts, is buried there. And on my right is, the Granary Burying Ground with the likes of Paul Revere, Sam Adams, Crispus Attucks, and John Hancock.


After that I turn up Park Street toward Beacon Street and the State House. I run down Beacon Street and into the Public Gardens. I run past Make Way for Ducklings out of the gardens and onto the Boston Commons. Once I leave the commons, which did you know at one time was used as cow fields, I run in and out of some small streets until I arrive on Milk Street. Milk Street has been a street in Boston for 100s of years and was the street where Benjamin Franklin was born. After Milk Street I end up on Atlantic Avenue and the Greenway until I head to the Harbor and back to Broad Street. The entire run is about 3.3 miles long, not an intense run but reminds me of who I am and where I came from!

I was able to do this run twice while I was in the city for work. The second day I decided to do it during a nor'easter. Boston like much of the northeast was hit with a storm but the city got rain and high, high winds all day. The winds hit 60-90 miles per hour at times during the day. When I headed out in the morning the wind was about 45 miles per hour. I saw this run as an adventure and I was curious about the weather. I will tell you that at times the run was probably a bit dangerous since I had to brace myself at intersection to stop the wind from pushing me. My route was filled with puddles but I did not see high tide but later that day my route was under water. Prayers go out to all those who were seriously affected by this storm.

I do love this city and it always feels like home...have running sneakers, will travel!!

How the Olympics Inspire!

February 22 was the anniversary of the 1980 Miracle on Ice. On this same day, the women’s hockey team beat Canada after a 20-year drought. The last time the US Team beat Canada, at the Olympics, was 1998 at the Nagano games in Japan. The other highlight of the day was the men’s curling team beat the Canadian team, which was the Olympic defending champions. The US curling team went on to win gold at the games. And let’s not forget during this past week, that the US women (Diggins & Randall) won the first ever Gold for the US in cross country skiing!

When the women’s hockey team won the gold medal, it brought me back to 20 years ago. I was living and working at the Olympic Training Center in Colorado that year. Many of the 1998 winter Olympic athletes were living at the training center before they left for Japan, including the women’s hockey team. Prior to the start of the Olympics, I was able to watch the last exposition game of the US vs Canada in Colorado. The US won that night and went on to beat Canada a few weeks later for the first gold medal in Olympic women’s hockey. I cannot believe it was 20 years ago, it feels like yesterday. I am excited for 2018 Olympic team, as they never gave up the fight!

As you watch the games, it is obvious that these athletes did not wake up one day and say I think I will try this. It has been years of training and years of early morning wake up calls that get you to the podium, never mind the Olympics themselves. Of course, the 15 and 17-year-old Olympic gold medal winners probably did not get up as many times as the 30-year-old Olympic athletes. Imagine what their futures hold for them. 

I came to terms many years ago that I would not be an Olympic athlete (I wanted to be a downhill skier). However, as I watch the athletes from curling to luge to the biathlon I realize I can continue to train and work to be the best athlete I can be. I can get up before the sun and push myself to do the best that I can. I do not have to compete against anyone else but against myself. I can compete against the doubts and the voices that say I am not good enough.

This past week I have been emotionally and physically exhausted. Between my workouts, work, and schoolwork I was spent. We all will have days or weeks like this, and we have to decide will it beat us. We are all stronger than we think and if it is important to us, we will find a way to get it done.

So when that alarm goes off tomorrow morning will I let it beat me or will I let it inspire me? Will I attack the day to be the best athlete I can be? I will remind myself that each day will get me closer to my goals. I may never stand on a podium but I won’t stop trying!

I was actually home...

So this week I didn't travel anywhere!! I was able to unpack my suitcase and stay put...I didn't know what to do with myself! On Wednesday, February 14th I took a personal day from work...Oh how I looked forward to that day. It ended up being a beautiful day, the sun was shining and I decided to celebrate life.

I had a speed workout on the training schedule, mile repeats that day. I headed out of my house to complete the workout and that morning the first mile lied to me. I felt so sluggish and did not want to continue but I pushed myself with each step. I didn't pay attention to my times while I was running I just did the run and tried to stay out of my head. In the end I had negative splits. Every mile was faster than the last one and my final mile was one of my fastest. Oh how your mind and body can lie to you!!

Once I finished my run I got changed and headed for the slopes. The sun was shining, it was a bit warm, but the skiing was fabulous. It was the kind of conditions that I love, packed powder, well groomed and a bit granular. Two hours of uninterrupted skiing. I was in such a good space. The best part I couldn't check my work emails. In order to check emails I need my glasses...except I can't ski with my glasses...oh well...the world didn't come to an end!

I finished the day attending a panel of speakers at work who focused on higher education trends, right up my alley. I loved it and the panel was fabulous! And of course after the panel I had to go to the library to do my own school work. It was a great day and I am so glad I took the day off!!

Today I had a 10 mile training run. It had snowed overnight and was a bit chilly compared to earlier this week. It was a pretty good run...I felt good but some miles were better than others. The one thing I hate is when nature calls and I have to find a place to go. When you are running through neighborhoods it is not easy but today I was running near farm fields which don't give you a lot of places to hide during the winter. Sorry...TMI...just things I think about when I run.


A highlight during my run, which happened about mile 6, a beautiful, brilliant red cardinal flew right in front of me and landed in a tree along the side of the road. As I passed by the tree the cardinal looked at me and flew away.

I have heard this saying throughout my life and I believe it. People say that when a cardinal appears there are angels near you. I often think of my mom or other family members who have become angels when I see a cardinal out a window or in other locations. However, today I saw when on my run and at that moment I knew the exact angel that was near me. I think about this particular angel during my workouts and always during races. Thank you Brendan I needed you today and you always know when to show up!

After finishing my run I treated myself to a fabulous breakfast. I was hungry and it hit the spot. I also tried out a new chocolate milk as an award for my workout. I love chocolate milk and it is a great recovery drink. I am a huge Byrne Dairy fan but I may have a new favorite. I highly recommend Fairlife reduced fat Chocolate milk. It was soooo good and soooo yummy. It is low in sugar and high in protein! I use their regular non-fat milk that I wanted to try their chocolate milk and it is a winner!!

I hope you all have a fabulous week. Keep moving and celebrate life!!

Travel and Training...

Training takes dedication and discipline. And when you travel for your job it takes a lot of extra dedication and discipline! I am a true believer if you really want something you will find a way if not you will find an excuse.

When I am on the road I usually just pack my running shoes because that is the easiest to do on the road. Many hotels don't have pools and those that do they are wicked small, I get dizzy doing laps. And of course most "fitness centers" in hotels barely have a treadmill never mind a bike.

Over the first 11 days of February I traveled to three different cities. I was in NYC, Chicago, and Boston. For all three trips I packed my shoes and many, many layers since it was soooo cold throughout the country. In NY I did a loop of several miles up 5th avenue and back down 6th avenue. For some reason every time I run in NYC my times are really fast...I think it is because I am trying to beat the intersections and avoid the tourist!!

Chicago...my happy place! I was able to run twice through this windy city! The first day was early in the morning just as the sun was coming up. It had snowed the night before so the city was so beautiful as the sun reflected off the fresh snow. It was cold but so beautiful. And you have to love a place that makes clearing the snow on the river walk a priority!

Where the discipline came in on this trip was on Wednesday morning. We were had to head to the airport by 8:30 AM which meant I had to head out before the sun rose. Once again I put the layers on and headed out for my run. Unlike the day before where I watched the sun rise on this morning the snow was falling around me. The city was peaceful but once again so beautiful along the lake! I always look forward to running when I am in Chicago!

A day after returning from Chicago I unpacked my suitcase and repacked for a trip to Boston and once again my sneakers were coming with me. I was in Boston over a long weekend but did my runs in the suburb of Newton. I actually ran along the Boston Marathon route 16 to Commonwealth Ave. There were so many people training both Saturday and Sunday and I discovered that the Newton Fire Station on the corner of 16 and Comm Ave lets runners use their bathroom...always good to know.

I am home for the next two weeks but soon enough my bags will be packed again! Training is always an adventure!!

After reflecting...I am ready to start...

So after taking the month of January to reflect on 2017 and I am now ready to focus on 2018. I am ready to make a few changes...add a few things... and become a stronger and better person. 2018 I hope you grant me this mulligan!

I reflected on not only what I did during 2017 but also on what I did not accomplish during 2017. I reviewed the list of resolutions I came up with at the end of 2017 and decided I needed to trim them down and really focus on what I really wanted. I also did a WOOP exercise for each resolution idea (don't worry I won't share all of it with you).

Do you know what I mean by a WOOP exercise? I was first introduced to this exercise by a friend who presented it at a networking event. During a WOOP exercise you pick a goal or resolution and break it down into four parts; Wish, Outcome, Obstacles, and Plan. By breaking your goals or resolutions down you can anticipate what might get in your way from achieving them.

So what will I focus on this year...Last year my word for 2017 was Strength...I am going to continue to use Strength but I have also added Control...worry about what I can control...not what I can't! However, my unofficial word for 2018 is WORK...As I was reflecting on things this past month I realized there is one thing I am always doing and that is work...not just the kind that I get paid for but other work. I wake up in the morning and I WORKOUT...then I go to WORK...after work I do SCHOOL WORK! And every single one of these is very important to me and is a priority.

In January I started writing and meditating in the morning. Granted some mornings I missed but worked hard to get it done. Even though I missed last Sunday I have brought my blog back into my life and plan to continue. Strength Training is a huge goal of mine...I want to get stronger and build my muscles which can help me with my endurance training and weight loss. I want this to be a habit and workout that is just as important as my swim, bike, and run workouts. Slowly I have added this in during the week. Not quite a habit yet.

As far as finances are concerned, I have opened two new savings accounts and have my money automatically moved into them...one step at a time. I decided to cut a few of my finance goals out and focus on just 1 or 2 and achieve those first. I need to take this one step at a time and control what I can control! On a totally different note I want to learn how to make pie crust and I need to finish my window/medal project (it's only been 3 years)!!

Of course throughout the year there will be full and half marathons...sprint triathlons and half ironmans and as I achieve the goals I have set above...it is my plan that these endurance events will be more and more successful!  I decided to break my goals/resolutions down in order to make them achievable. Looking at my large list from last year ... I did not accomplish a majority of my resolutions. I want 2018 to be different!

I am hoping for a successful 2018 not only for me but for all of you! I will keep you posted!!

For now great job Patriots! I am still so proud! Pitchers and Catchers arrive to spring training on February 13...Go Red Sox...The Celtics are in first place and the Bruins are in second! All is good!